UN: Zodiac | With April Showers...

[kaisoumods]

WHO: Everyone!
WHERE: Libra App
WHEN: April 1st
WHAT: Zodiac Network Post
WARNINGS: None!

[The Spirit Vein in the sky shifts from greens to oranges and browns as the element dominance shift into the Earth element. With it, the howling winds of March die down and leave mild spring weather. As usual, the blaring alert sound that comes with a new Zodiac post. The alert will sound even if you have your phone turned off or on silent, and will take over your phone until you read and comment to the message.]


Zhongli, Ryouta, Shio, Rren, and Ei have joined the app. Say hi everyone!


Kakyoin, Yuri, Anna, Ryoji, and Hu Tao has left the app.

[The post then continues on as normal.]

Hello! Thank you for using the Libra App!

Happy April everyone! We just wanted to show our appreciation for all your concerns with our last update. That was sent in error and we assure you all our employees are happy, healthy and alive. If you've notice us being quiet, it's because everyone at Zodiac is hard at work working on something we can't announce just yet! But be sure to check back April 15th, the day after our quarter CEO board meeting, for the exciting announcement!

By the way, we've recently been made aware of a gas leak in the Undertown area. We're currently working to contain the leak. Until further notice, we ask that you stay out of the Undertown area for your own protection.

Finally, we'd like to remind tenents in the Zodiac apartments that should you choose to move, we'd appreciate you contact us with a change of address form so we know where to deliver any mail! So Varian and Fern, if you could please contact us with your change of address, that'd be great. :)

That's all for today! Now let's end off with our ever-popular icebreaker question!



This post has been sponsored by the Chinese diner Aiya! Now through April, you can take on Rainy Day Mega Beef Bowl Challenge on any rainy day! Push yourself to the limits and grow as a person!

[Users will have the option to choose their own display names and userpics if they haven't already. If nothing is chosen, the app will use their real name and a quick photo taken of them from their camera's phone. Kakyoin, Yuri, Anna, Ryoji, and Hu Tao will be around the city with no memories of the app.

Should anyone attempt to go to Undertown, they will find the place has been emptied out of its usual crowd and instead it'll be full of mysterious people in black suits that will insist that you shouldn't be down there. Should you attempt to ignore their warnings, they will be willing to use force to remove you from the area. Some will even come equipment with enchanted objects that neutralize any superhuman abilities for a full day should you try to muscle your way through. Attmepts to teleport will also be blocked. Black Order members will find the reaction to you will rise to hostilities MUCH quicker. Good job! You made your presences known!

Many of the former occupants of Undertown can be found holed up in the Void Denny's, should you still require their wares.

Like always, there'll be no responses from Zodiac. ]

Comments

text: un: trienemybest

[droptheious]

[Well, he's sure McFuckin' glad that he went to live in Amal's place right now.]

Pass. You can burn our mail. We don't want it.

[defendure]

You guys take care...I don't think I've ever seen such an ominous emoji before.

text: un: Deja Boo

[schrodingersghost]

[That was a threat from Zodiac, wasn't it? That was definitely a threat. And Danny was both very unhappy about the danger from Zodiac and worried about his friends.]

Are you guys doing okay still?

text | un: blackbirdtarot

[drewthetower]

think my tarot cards are less ominous than these fucks

un: yuureisen; video

[areyuuserious]

[Normally, they'd do text, but frankly, just text will not convey the mood behind what they have to say--

So Yuu just smiles sweetly--although one might say it's entirely too saccharine to be sincere--and leans towards the camera, just a bit.]

You guys can just fuck off, okay?

[Oh, okay, that is an edge to their voice.]

video; un: eunietheboss

[medicgunner]

Couldn't've said it better myself. [Meanwhile Eunie looks unbelievably pissed off. She likes you already though, Yuu.]

text | un: paintedfox

[stripartist]

To any of Yuri's students: if you need an excuse from his class due to app related accidents or events, please seek me out. I will do my best to help.

I will not, however, give you a free pass if you simply want to skip class.

un: silverrose

[fionnuisce]

You know what's funny?

By which I mean, not remotely funny at all?

'Gas leak' is the automatic cover story the Church and Association use for 'magic shit happened, something probably exploded, and we can't explain the fallout any other way'.

text; un: ♡☮STAMPEDE

[doubledollar]

funny, its the excuse officials use back home when there's Plant malfunctions too that they don't want to explain.
gas leak, chemical spill, hazardous waste...

it's always something sketchy.
i always like to believe the best in people, but
these last few official messages have made even Me uncomfortable.

un: n-jima

[evoked]

I want to try the beef bowl challenge.

[ His only take away. ]

un: yuureisen

[areyuuserious]

NGL, I kind of want to try it, too.

text; un: fern

[laminae]

[Ohhhh wow that's creepy.]

yeah ok the last thing we're gonna do is tell you donks where we've gone
c'mon i'm dumb but not that dumb

[droptheious]

You're not dumb.

[He's not allowing this nonsense today, good sir!!]

It's fine. We'll just buckle down. If they're looking for us then they haven't found us.

[This is about as far from "fine" as it can be but here they are.]

un: deku

[defendure]

I've always wondered this, but are the sponsorships actually sponsoring anything or do they just pick at random?

un: noxxed

[sassery]

oh
thanks
hate all of that
not to mention you assholes are being even worse then usual
gas leak tho huh?
suuuuuuure

un: silverrose

[fionnuisce]

Seriously. I'm still surprised anyone buys that shit back home, it was never going to fly in a place where magic is barely a secret.

text; un: eunietheboss

[medicgunner]

what you really think anyone here is about to dox some kids? GO RIGHT TO FUCKIN HELL AND STAY THERE

text; un: kissmyash

[switchaxe]

[Well he was gonna be angry on the post but Eunie beat him to it so.]

just how far up their own asses are they?

text · un: vinviv

[mehjin]

even if we didnt all know whats up you know the smiley does not make you seem friendly right

un: takahata

[reignitions]

The fact that it's actually difficult to say whether they do or don't know is not reassuring at all

un: c-z; text

[bolledivita]

[Ugh.]

right so

everyone be careful and at least TRY not to do anything especially stupid

text · un: vinviv

[mehjin]

asking an awful lot there boss

text; un: kissmyash

[switchaxe]

un: deku

[defendure]

It's so catchy...

text; un: vermeowenby

[cheep_soongbird_knockoff]

Okay. Maybe chill with the alert tone. Little excessive, don't you think?

[Not that their heart was still pounding a mile a minute or like their ears hurt from the damn tone coming out of nowhere. Nope. Not at all.]

If you want an answer to the Icebreaker question: How am I supposed to know? I hardly even know what I want to do with my life now.

[There. Maybe that comment would be enough to let them navigate away... but maybe they would check the other comments out first, they were here anyway, right?]

text; un: ♡☮STAMPEDE

[doubledollar]

They're always excessive, I think. I'm starting to think it's a bit of a coverup?

Anyway, living forever probably isn't as cracked up as people might think it is.
I think a short but full life is better than a long and aimless one.

[ not that he knows anything about that. ]

voice; un: jcarter_news

[phoenixwiz]

Wow that is getting very worrisome. Gas leaks are really terrifying but it can’t be used for a coverup, can it? I haven’t been to the Undertown area but hopefully everyone will be safe. Just try not to do anything crazy over there.

text: un: ♡☮STAMPEDE

[doubledollar]

you'd be surprised
honestly, it's nothing new
back home whenever something went wrong with a Plant and they wanted ordinary folk to stay away, they'd claim it was a gas leak or a chemical spill and evacuate people.

so im skeptical of what this might actually be.

UN: hikari-vi

[whiteshroud]

"all our employees are happy, healthy and alive"

...

That intern is dead, aren't they.

un: silverrose

[fionnuisce]

Probably. If not him, then someone certainly is.

UN: Thorn

[poisontippedcure]

I’m not sure I would want to. Not that I want to die, mind you, but i think it would be sad to outlive my loved ones like that.

text; un: ♡☮STAMPEDE

[doubledollar]

being long lived doesn't necessarily mean happiness
usually those who live longer have less to be happy about, from my experience.
they get more jaded as the years grow long.

UN: Inazuma

[eiternity]

Were I to live forever, I would ensure my legacy. I would do my best to prevent the erosion of time.

private

[stripartist]

Is everything alright, Ei?

Text; un: Opera_Ghost

[not_a_possum]

That's really worrying how you emphasize that your employees are all alive like that when no one had been questioning whether they were alive.

It makes it seem a bit like they might not be.

text; un: ♡☮STAMPEDE

[doubledollar]

usually, unless a message like that comes from the mouth of the person in question

it can't really be trusted.

video | un: deadpeopletea

[four_quarts]

...Considering that I know your company has seers, I'm sure you know that I just might live forever.

[It remains unvoiced, but the second part is clear from his tone and expression: "If you keep this up, pray that you do not."]

Text; un: houndof

[lancernexttime]

Living forever isn't all it's cracked up to be, is it?

text; un: riftdancer

[thavnairian]

[Ah, they're threatening his sonthing.]

my favorite icebreaker question is "how does it feel to have 8 inch high heels up your ass?"

i'm happy to show you the answer intimately. unlike my other private sessions i'll even do it free of charge

text: un: trienemybest

[droptheious]

[Father craves violence.]

It's not worth it. They're just trying to bait us.

[crystallinememories]

I have heard from some reliable sources that living forever is really not all it's cracked up to be.

[literally the only time he would ever refer to emet-selch as a 'reliable source']

As for your missing renters, perhaps it is a sign that you should treat those in your care a bit more amicably in the future?

[varian and fern didn't know there were getting a second 'will fuck shit up for you' dad but here he is now.]

un: jcarter_news

[phoenixwiz]

Oh yeah I would agree with that sentiment too: living forever does sound like a terrible predication to be in. I hate to imagine having to outlive the people I love for millennia.

(Why does this talk about immortality begin to ring a bell to Jamie already? He has no idea that this will give him a very eerie memory from another life.)