[sermon 7] dearly beloved we gather here today to unite these souls in holy mogtrimony

[asipofbride]

WHO: Wolfwood + the cottage crew + you!
WHERE: the network + the cottage
WHEN: after the Fae Olympic fiasco
WHAT: so Wolfwood has a question for anybody more learned than he. which is most people. the religious cult was a bit pared to scope on what they taught. he's also living the fallout in real time and maybe, just maybe, the desert planet doesn't sound so bad?
WARNINGS: n/a at the moment!

how much legal advice can you get for an apple pie and a prayer; network post; text; un: ndwolfwood

so i have a question that i'm asking for a friend.

ya'll know them white flying rat-bear things with the head tumors on a string?

how, uh. how legally binding is marital paperwork if they deliver it to you? asking for a friend.

... the friend is me. they showed up at my door and threw sparkly trash at me and gave me rings and wouldn't leave until i pulled a gun on them and now Dante's not talking to me from where he's laying on the floor and Vash went out the window after them

i dont know how to be married help
don't open the door for those little shits
i can dump water on devils right it won't make them melt or turn into steam

don't even have to go to the chapel you're already married; action

[ this is a two cigarette problem.

Wolfwood has one cigarette in his mouth and another in his hand and he's just sort of staring out of the window if anyone wants to drop by--or if any of the residents of the cottage want to hash out what the White Menace just brought to their doorstep.

Slappy the Popplio is balancing the rings on his nose and having a grand ol' time, all things considered. ]

Comments

text; un: ndwolfwood

[asipofbride]

whaddya mean again
are they just runnin around marrying people rogue
does that have implications

like it's not the worst thing that's ever been done to me against my particular desires but
i dunno
i dunno?

[fiddlestick]

Basically, yeah. They forced me into a marriage last month.
I even tried to warn Vash about it.

[That warning was in vain, it seems]

It's not the worst thing, really.
I say take it one day at a time and talk to your partners once they have a chance to calm down about what they want to do.
Oh, and you should write up a list of free stuff you want.
People love giving gifts for marriages, apparently.

text: un: ♡☮STAMPEDE

[doubledollar]

i tried to run for the door when i saw them thru the window but kNI LET THEM IN

text | un: kni

[ornamentals]

you told me to! this isn't my fault!

[doubledollar]

the ONE creature id have told u to shut the door on...

[ornamentals]

how was i supposed to know that?

if we kill the creature would that nullify the deal?

[doubledollar]

NOONE'S KILLING ANYTHING

[ornamentals]

it could work.

[kill it--]

[doubledollar]

WE'RE NOT EVEN ENTERTAINING THE IDEA
i was hoping to catch one to get it to revoke it...,

if im gonna get married i want the party not just
glitter and bad trumpets

[ornamentals]

you want a party for everything.

[didn't they just have a party last year? once is enough.]

[doubledollar]

...parties are fun...

1/2

[ornamentals]

they're not, but we can agree to disagree.

[ornamentals]

if you want a party, you should have a party.

[sighs!]

[doubledollar]

It could be a fun party.

There's a role that kids usually play during a wedding. They throw flowers petals around for decorations.

You could do that.
I'll even use my magic to make the flower petals so we won't hurt actual flowers.

[ornamentals]

you think all parties are fun.

i'll play whatever role you'd like for me, vash.
it's your party, after all.
and dante's.
and wolfwood's.

[his brother is so kind.]

i'm sure eve would like to help as well.

[fiddlestick]

Aha, did Kni know he was not supposed to open the door to them?

1/2

[doubledollar]

2/2

[doubledollar]

i might have forgot to mention to him

[fiddlestick]

Welp.

Guess you were the one at fault then! Congrats on the marriage! 👰
If you decide you want a violinist at the party, I'd be happy to offer at a discounted rate.

1/2

[asipofbride]

vash knew this was a possibility

[ wolfwood's going to be a half widow by the end of the day that motherfucker ]

2/2

[asipofbride]

i
like i'm not that bothered by it deep down
they're my guys, y'know
it's fine they're just both freaking out because
they've got a lot of baggage
and i'm freaking out because i have no idea what this changes or means
but i love free shit
goddamn i love free shit i'm on it

[fiddlestick]

[Welp. Rest in pieces Vash Stampede]

It only changes things if you want it to change things.
Mostly it'll give you guys different legal privileges that non-married couples don't have.
If you're happy as you are now, then don't worry about it.

Haha, okay. Once you guys calm down I'll send you instructions on how to make a gift registry.
Get that free stuff!

[asipofbride]

[ Dante will be the last one standing as Wolfwood attempts to return to the worms in the dirt ]

and uh
what does that mean exactly
back home it's a lot more informal
people stick together until they don't, yknow?

I think Zulius wants to do a party
a big gay party
whatever that means

[fiddlestick]

Okay, lemme see if I can explain.
The laws in this world view your close family as trustworthy.
Say you fell unconscious and had to go to the hospital until you woke up.
Since I'm not your family and you're not awake to vouch for me, I wouldn't be allowed in your hospital room because they don't know if they can trust me.
But your family would be allowed to see you, because they've been deemed trustworthy.
And that's just one example. There's hundreds of situations where this can apply.

Normally, the law recognizes your parents or your kids as your close family members.
But when you marry someone, you are telling the legal system: "This person is also my family. I trust them".

Does that make sense? My husband's really the one you should talk to about law stuff.