kaisou | Voice message; un: pirateking

Uh huh, and how long were you told to wait for?

Wait. Wait.

You're saying you want TWO parties? So this...no reason party and then a "we didn't die horribly from murder lizards, go us" party later?

That seems like an excessive amount of parties.

[ONE is an excessive number of parties for Bruno but there you go. ]

That's a second of silence at Luffy works out what excessive means.

How is it too many?

You can never have too many parties.

Bruno, you are about to meet your opposite in many, many ways. Luffy is down to throw parties for any stupid reason. Or no reason. There's no such thing as too many parties to this child.

I was told to wait for a month. But that seems like a really long time.

I promise you when you're not good with people no parties can be too many parties.

[His family loves parties and Bruno would honestly rather do anything than spend time at one.]

I mean, it's not that long. In the grand scheme of things. When you think about it. Like, a month is nothing when you think about a year, right?

The only time I've spent waiting a year for anything was when I was training to be stronger. That took about ten years! I almost died a lot.

Other than that, I think the longest I've waited for anything was dinner? It was about forty minutes and I was starving! Sanji kicked me in the head cause I wouldn't shut up! Shi shi shi shi.

He speaks... fondly... of being kicked in the head.

I can't imagine not liking parties. Although, I dunno if I'm good with people or not. I'm a pirate, not a hero.

[Luffy can't see it, but Bruno is for sure staring skywards right now.]

Yup. A decade sure is a real long time. What did you do that was so dangerous?

Hah, well, we've all hit that point before now. Once I had this whole opera for my sister because I was wasting away from lack of food. I get it.

[He definitely was not wasting away at any point, but sometimes you've gotta be a little dramatic!]

Wait. You're a pirate? Did you show up on the ships last month?

Oh, that wasn't really me! My Grampa is really tough. He tied balloons to me and sent me up into the sky. He shoved me down into a ravine. He threw me into a jungle at night. All to teach me how to survive!

And his fists hurt! He's one of the few people who can hurt me when he punches me!

Ah. But after all that, he sent me to live with some mountain bandits. That's where I met my two older brothers! I trained really hard with Ace over the next ten years! Aside from getting caught by one guy, who punched me a bunch with some spiked gloves, we mainly had to worry about fighting the wild animals. But it was fun!

His idea of 'fun' will never be on the same wavelength as normal people. But then again, he wasn't exactly raised normal, either.

There were ships??

No!

Where are the ships? I miss being on a ship. It's weird, being away from my crew and my ship.

And yup, I'm a pirate! I'm Luffy, I'm going to be King of the Pirates! I just got here, I think. With the dinosaurs. It's weird that there are no giants. In Little Garden, there were two really cool giants, Dorry and Broggy! One of them saved me after I was eaten by a dinosaur. That was fun, too! They had really great stories and had been battling for over 100 years.

[What.

The actual.

Fuck.]

Okay I think you lost me at around the point you started talking about the balloons.

We definitely don't have giants. Right now, anyway. But yeah, there were ships and people fought skeletons and there was a KRAKEN which was deeply not fun and a pirate's life is definitely not for me, no sir.

Oh. Don't worry, these were good mountain bandits! Not the bad ones. Those ones are all dead, Shanks and his crew killed them all!

Reassurance, because clearly, that was the most concerning part of his story. Mountain bandits.

A kraken?? How cool!! I wanna see it! I want it as a pet!

Not the correct reaction at all.

I love being a pirate! It's so much fun! There's so many adventures to be had and new friends to make!

[Oh god, is he having a stroke? Is this what a stroke feels like?]

So the good ones...don't hurt people?

[He is so concerned, Luffy. So concerned.]

I'm like 90% sure they killed it? And it's also in the spirit realm so you probably can't see it anymore. Sorry.

I never really thought piracy was about making friends before. It felt more...pillage-y to me.

Nah, I don't think so? I think Dadan and them only stole from people occasionally. Pretty sure, anyway. I don't really remember how they got their money, only that if I wanted to eat, I had to help hunt it down! It was mostly me and Ace that did it, after...

Well, it was usually just the two of us! And then they'd cook it for us! Or Grandpa would!

He's not about to make it any better. Sorry, Bruno!

Oh. That sucks! Well, maybe we can find another one and befriend it! That seems like a really good pet to have.

Yes. He still wants to find and befriend a monster at some point, to make it his pet.

He laughs as Bruno's definition of pirates.

Oh yeah, that's definitely how most people view pirates! It's not like we're good guys, you know? I'm a pirate, not a hero!

Shi shi shi shi.

But I'd much rather have fun than pillage. And if I'm going to fight, I'd rather do it to help my friends! Having parties, fighting other pirates, going on adventures, being free. That's what being a pirate should be about!

That's why I'm going to be King of the Pirates! Then, I'll be freer than anybody else!

This is not at all someone who fits in as a stereotypical pirate. He's way too happy and friendly to fit with that image. And his goals don't really seem to match up with most pirates, either.

[Bruno's kinda staring at the screen because none of these names mean anything to him and he's starting to realise he's possibly talking to someone who is very young. It's the excited oversharing that gives it away. It's not the first time this world has brought in a youngster, but still, it's a worry. ]

Huh. How about that. So hey, just a question. Do you have anyone to live with right now? Like, is an adult around?

[LUFFY DO YOU NEED AN ADULT?]

Maybe one'll appear in the lake sometime next to the goose that tries to ruin everyone's day.

[Is telling Luffy about the Terrible Goose a bad call? Probably. Too late, he's done it now.]

That's definitely not the vibe I got last month. That sounds...kinda nice, actually. The freedom thing.

So how do you become a pirate king? Do you have to be a pirate prince first?

I kinda have a roommate in Taco. I think that's what she called it? Whenever I bother to go back to the apartments, I mean. I've been kinda wandering around and sleeping outside this week, checking everything out.

Taco is cool!

Her name also isn't Taco, so that doesn't really narrow it down or give any context to who this is.

Goose? What goose? I bet it would be delicious!

Everyone giving him terrible ideas. Absolutely everyone.

You have to find the fabled treasure, One Piece! It's an adventure! The previous Pirate King, Gold Roger, hid it somewhere on the Grand Line. So, I'm traveling to all these different islands with my crew, making new friends and fighting in wars and having parties and stuff, trying to find it!

One of these things is not like the other...

It's been a lot of fun! But, it's kinda dangerous, so I don't think you should try if you're bad at parties and stuff, Squeaky.

You have been dubbed 'friend' and therefore need a nickname. And your voice gets kinda high and cracky every time he tells you stuff. It fits, right?

[THIS CHILD?!! (CHILD!!!) HAS BEEN SLEEPING OUTSIDE?!!!]

Hey maybe you should stay inside instead of sleeping outside. Someone might mug you if you're sleeping outside. Is Taco an adult?

[Taco is food, and honestly, he's known Luffy for five minutes and he would completely believe the guy was talking about going home to an actual taco.]

You can't kill it, no one can. I think it's important. It lives in the park and it's awful. It does crimes.

...Wow that sounds like a lot. Um. Can to track back on the WAR thing? That sounds. Important.

[And worrying.]

Squeaky? Is that because of the rat thing?

[Because he assumes EVERYONE knows about The Rat Thing. Bruno has been called worse things, he'll take this.]

I'm not sure. I think she might be more adult than me but I didn't really ask.

To be fair, it's not hard to be more adult than Luffy in many regards. She is, in fact, about the same age as him. So no, not really an "adult" figure.

I'll go back once I'm finished exploring! Besides, I'm not worried! I'm a pirate, remember? It'd be really silly to try and rob me!

This is not reassuring, at all, despite his best intentions.

What, the two civil wars? Or liberating a couple villages from pirates. Or liberating an island from slavery? All that's not really important anymore. We fought for a bit, helped my friends win, but that's all a secret, you know? Nothing good comes from pirates helping out a country! Beating up god to save the sky island was kinda cool, though! Shi shi shi shi!

And what rats? Squeaky is cause of what I think you sound like! You remind me of my friend Usopp! His voice goes all high and squeaky and cracks a bunch when I tell him about our next adventure! It's funny! I bet you sound like him!

Well. You can usually tell if they're an adult on account of the fact they're over the age of 18.

Yeah but you probably would be better off being safe right? Avoiding it before it happens.

[What the fuckity fuck fuck has this kid been through?]

You beat up god? Like. GOD god?

[He's trying his best here, Luffy, he's so confused. ]

...Oh.

Okay that's- well I'm not THAT squeaky. But I have rats. Like. Lots of rats.

Is that what makes an adult to you? Huh. Guess that makes sense. Sabo wanted to set sail when he was 17 so he could avoid dealing with the responsibilities of being a noble. It's why Ace and I both set sail at 17.

So he's technically almost an adult. Although it could definitely be argued that some 18 year olds still shouldn't be considered adults.

Everybody called him that but I think he was just a big bully with logia powers. If he was a god, then he would have been the god of lightning, I guess. I smacked him around good, stopped him from destroying everything. And I managed to ring the bell, finally! It ended up putting an end to a 400 year war but I don't really care about that. I just wanted my friend to know that the city of gold existed. His ancestor wasn't a liar, after all.

It would break your brain to know that everything he's told you has happened in less than a year. Good luck, Bruno!

Whatever you say, Squeaky! Rats are cool. My friend Chopper loves animals so you'd probably get along with him, too.

Pretty much, yeah. Or old enough to look after a kid anyway

...Wait, you're seventeen?

[He definitely thought Luffy was like, EIGHT. He still has no idea what he's reading, most of this makes no sense. If this were on video, he'd be smiling and nodding nervously.]

That sounds like... a wild time. You sure have gone on some adventures at such a young age, huh? Thank you for stopping my brain from being broken.

[His brain is SO broken.]

Rats ARE cool. Rats are the coolest animal there is and that's a fact.

Yeah! Like I said, me and my brother Ace both set sail when we were 17! I just set sail this year but Ace set sail three years ago! It was really good seeing him again, after so long.

But, being an adult as 18 only counts for nobles, right? Sabo was trying to avoid that but me and Ace, we didn't really have much to worry about. We were all pretty much independent since we were like... Well, I was 7 but my brothers were 10!

I mean, to be fair, he was mostly raised by 10 year olds with the occasional adult influence. It's reasonable to think he's a bit mentally immature for his age. He's much more mature in a life or death situation, able to take charge and delegate responsibility, but otherwise? He basically lives off instinct. Not exactly the mentality of what most would consider an adult.

We've gone on a lot of adventures, me and my crew! It's been a lot of fun!

Sorry not sorry, Bruno. That's about as little brain broken as you get with him. At least he didn't regale you with a story about the power of the afro, like he did Yoosung?

You'd definitely like Chopper! He can talk to animals, too. Understand them. It's pretty cool! But yeah, rats are nice. Do you have any as pets?

...Yeah, I can understand that. It's hard, huh? Missing your siblings after being apart for so long.

Um, no, no I think it's with most people. Being an adult at 18. Seven would be considered preeeetyy young to be independent.

[Sure, he had the weight of being the village seer fully on him at that point, but he still had his mother to watch him. Perhaps a little too closely at times. ]

That's nice. The talking to animals thing is a pretty new ability for me. My nephew can do it back home though. And sure! I've got ten of them right now.

It definitely is. Ave and I spent almost every waking moment for about a decade training together. It was weird, suddenly being on my own, at 14. Kinda hard, even.

He's never really talked with anyone about how hard those three years were for him, essentially alone. He had the Dadan and the mountain bandits, Makino and the Mayor and Windmill Village, but it wasn't the same. He liked all of them but wasn't close to them, not like he'd been with Ace and Sabo. But, he doesn't know Bruno well enough to open up anymore to him, so he's swiftly moving on.

Grandpa and Dadan raised me to be independent since I was little, so it was fine! I grew up just fine, I think!

He considers what he's being told for a moment.

You're nephew?

Oh! The cool little dude! Yeah, he's neat. He offered to talk to dinosaurs for me but I told him they're all gone. He's a neat little dude but I don't think he should be playing with dinos just yet, even if he can talk to them.

Ten rats sounds really cool! Must be nice, having so many pets!

Luffy doesn't judge Bruno for own rats or having so many pets. He's genuinely enthusiastic for him. He loves pretty much all life and like he said, he wants a pet himself. He just wants a much more extreme pet.

14 is a really hard age to be alone. No one should be alone then.

[Luffy can't see it, but oh boy had Bruno's expression softened. He was pretty lonely at 14, but he still had his sisters then. For the most part.]

It doesn't mean you should have been, though. Kids need someone to take care of them. Instead of just being left to work it out by themselves.

That's him. He's a really cool little dude, yeah. He doesn't have his memories of us here, it's like a...other life situation. You'll see that here a lot.

I like them anyway. They're really good companions, rats. People give them a bad rep.

Don't worry, I'm not alone anymore!

Or at least, I wasn't, before I arrived here. I had my crew, lots of friends, my own ship. We went on lots of adventures together and did everything together.

I'm sure I'll find people to be with here, too!

Ever the optimist, that's Luffy.

I mean, I had Ace and Sabo to look after me! My two big brothers! Up until Sabo went away and then it was only Ace.

He doesn't expand or focus on that part. He tries not to think about it much.

Oh. Wow. I can't even imagine that. That must be really really hard for you.

Seeing someone you care about and consider family and them not knowing you or remembering you sounds terrible to Luffy. He'd hate that.

I wanto to meet them some time. Rats sounds cool.

Good. I'm glad. Being alone can be pretty miserable.

Do you have anyone from home here? Or is it just you?

[He's been fortunate enough to have a lot of family here, but he knows not everyone is that lucky.]

Sorry you lost...Sabo. Why did he go?

[Speaking as someone who also purposefully left for a while, he might be a little curious.]

Sure thing, Kiddo. They like meeting people.

Nope! I don't know anyone here!

Or, well, I didn't. Now I know Taco and I met Explodo and this teleport power guy and a genius and cool little dude and--

Luffy expands on his ever growing list of people he's met since getting here. It's a lot. A lot.

--And Grumpy! He's the one who said we have to wait on the dinosaur party. I think I met him first but I don't really remember.

He's silent for a minute as he's asked about Sabo before answering rather abruptly. Both vague and an answer that says way too much.

We don't really talk about Sabo. He went away and he's not coming back.

He quickly recovers, though, focusing on happier thoughts.

Cool! That sounds like fun! I bet I'd like your rats a lot!

Sounds like you're making plenty of friends here already then, huh? That'll happen here. People are friendly.

[Which confuses him to hell and back, really. He's not used to people being so welcoming to him. There's a long pause because OH BOY does "we don't talk about" sit heavy and uncomfortable in his chest.]

I'm sure he had his reasons.

Voice message; un: pirateking

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