video | un: blackbirdtarot

[drewthetower]

WHO: August and the network
WHERE: The Network
WHEN: May 16th (so Monday)
WHAT: Many Announcements
WARNINGS: August Swears (tm)

[Hi everyone have one exhausted half-demon on your screen. His cards are laid out in front of him and behind him is his suitcase, still mostly packed. He only just got back.]

So. Some bullshit happened. Let's see what bullshit is coming at us next month and just move right the fuck along from the bullshit that came at us this month. Spoilers: we got no fuckin' clue but it's fucking weird as fuck!

[He is so tired. But he pulls up something on his phone.]

Right, this time we have a soundtrack because surprise there might be more seers! A bad recorder version of "My Heart Will Go On" but no clue if it's the "bad recorder" or "song" part that's relevant here...sheep, we saw a sheep...a fur--anthropomorphic animal suit or just an anthro character either/or, and possibly a hand with an eye? That one we're not sure about, but that's what the actual seers saw.

[He holds up the Fool card, upright.]

Meanwhile, I got this. For those of who you never touched that one series with the tarot themeing, this guy is the Fool. It is the start of the hero's journey! It means lots of things like beginnings and spontaneity and all that jazz! It tells me fuck all about the bullshit, however, but it is absolutely gonna be relevant so like. I'unno. Beware babies?

[Moving on. August will end this feed and start a new one]



PRIVATE TO ALL KNOWN ADULTS (18+ sorry you responsible 16/17 year olds)

[August takes a deep, deep breath.]

Apparently some of the younger kids got involved in that fucking soccer game and...no. Just no. Obviously Zodiac doesn't give a rat's ass about these kids so if everyone's cool with this, I wanna get a list of the younger ones or at least get all the other adults on this fuckin' app working together to try and keep them from getting hurt. I know we can't stop them from doing reckless shit like. In general, they're fucking kids kids do that, but if we at least know who to watch out for maybe what happened this month doesn't happen again.

[A sigh.]

The freshman--fourteen and fifteen year olds--and younger are the biggest concern right now, I think. The older ones are still kids but some of them are responsible enough to help even if I wouldn't put them in charge. That's just my opinion, and if anyone has any better ideas than a fucking list please share. It's just all I got right now.

Comments

[callmekacchan]

Questioning the validity of that statement.
You have the vibes of someone who needs to be on one of those child leashes.

[whiteshroud]

A leash could never hold me.

[callmekacchan]

I actually believe that.
Doesn't change my opinion about my previous statement.
Ignoring your age and labeling you an honorary child.

[whiteshroud]

Haha, yeah. I probably shouldn't be put in charge of kids.

[He knows this much about himself!]

You don't have to put me on a watch list though. My dad's already on the app.

[callmekacchan]

I never want to imagine being on social media with my parents.
That sounds like a nightmare.

[whiteshroud]

It is.
My priest is on here too.

Everyday on this app I wake up to a living nightmare.

[robopriest]

☜(ﾟヮﾟ☜)

[whiteshroud]

Hello Father Hansa.

See what I mean Bakugou?
I have no escape.

[robopriest]

the Lord is always watching who am i to say no to doing His good work? 👀

[whiteshroud]

Isn't your good work supposed to be tending the church rather than being on your phone?

[robopriest]

can't i do both?

[callmekacchan]

Old people have too much free time.

[Hansa showed up alarmingly quick when mentioned.]

It does sound more effective than a child leash though.
I can rest easy knowing something keeps you from reaching your full honorary problem child potential.

[whiteshroud]

Haha, yes. Don't worry, Mama! I'm well looked after.

[callmekacchan]

[For several moments it shows the three little dots that let Jun know he's typing as he writes something, erases. Lather, rinse repeat until;]

You know what?
I'm not having that conversation with you again, damn you.
Your curfew is now 6pm and your bedtime is 7:30pm.
Let's see how long before you return to the mom-free life.

[Humor is hard to translate via text but congrats, Jun, he's making an attempt to joke with you about it?]

[whiteshroud]

[Oh he can tell it's a joke. He makes a surprise but delighted laugh on his end when he sees Bakugou playing along.]

(＃°Д°) But that's not even sunset! Mama is so strict!

[callmekacchan]

'Mama' has shit to do.
Gotta get brats yeeted into beds.
All tucked in and told a bedtime story.
You asked for this.
No one but yourself to blame.

[whiteshroud]

You're gonna read me a bedtime story? (((o(*ﾟ▽ﾟ*)o)))

[callmekacchan]

Yeah, I have the perfect one for you.

[whiteshroud]

Haha, ah yes. A classic.

[callmekacchan]

Looks like it's a series.
Aren't you a lucky brat?

[He kind of unironically wants to own these though...]

[whiteshroud]

Whoa, I never thought that book would get a series.

I almost want to read them to see the saga unfold.