[Network Post] March into March!

[kaisoumods]

WHO: Everyone!
WHERE: Libra App
WHEN: March 1st
WHAT: Zodiac Network Post
WARNINGS: None!

[Wherever you are, your phone will start to ring and vibrate. It doesn’t matter if your phone was off or on mute - it will ring anyway. Checking the phone, you'll see the Libra app has opened itself and will not close until you read and response to a new post from Zodiac]

Hello! Thank you for using the Libra App!

Just a few quick words today! First of all, we'd like to extend a congratulations to Horse! While Zodiac is looking into ways to return everyone to their homes, Horse took the initiative and found a way on her own! She truly showed that a can-do attitude truly is all you need to overcome barriers! We're proud of you, Horse, you're an inspiration to all of us, and we wish you the best wherever you may be.

But for the rest of you, don't worry! Zodiac is still here to monitor the situation and support you where it's needed. As we mentioned before, everyone on this app is experiencing unusual spirit readings. We've also found that this may cause some side effects such as a change in hair or eye color, new unusual body parts, new abilities and minor memory problems. So far there's no indication that these side effects are serious, so try not to worry about it! We promise to continue to keep you informed, as Zodiac values good and open communication.

Also, thank you for all your specimen donations last month! They will help in our understanding of how to utilize the Spirit Realm for the benefit of humanity.

Now, let's end things off with an icebreaker question!


This post has been sponsored by Mayfield Cafe! Come for the Sea-Salt Ice Cream, Stay for the Hedgehog Croquet!

[Users will have the option to choose their own display names and userpics if they haven't already. If nothing is chosen, the app will use their real name and a quick photo taken of them from their camera's phone. Like always, there'll be no responses from Zodiac]

Comments

video | un: fashonti

[thaumewturge]

[Just. Just this face.]

You know, I believe there are members of government who are more useful that this lot.

text, un: spiderlily;

[higanbana]

[Ris cannot be expected to be on camera right now. She can't shitpost with all of this hate.]

i was gonna say idk i think they're about equal but then i remembered you're a furry and your idea of government is probably pretty different from mine

video (honestly she's too lazy for text)

[thaumewturge]

Whatever a furry is, I am not it and I highly doubt "useless bureaucracy", "corrupt oligarchy", and "even more corrupt theocracy" are unique to Hydaelyn.

[Granted the "pirate city-state", "empire designed to fail within a generation", and everything that is Radz-at-Han? Yeah okay.]

text

[higanbana]

yeah i'm not gonna explain that to you, we tried to do that last month and i'm pretty sure the gates to hell briefly opened and NO THANKS

i mostly meant you got those wiggly kitty ears. which means you aren't from this world.

[thaumewturge]

[The unamused teacher face is strong right now.]

Please do not refer to my ears like that. They are my ears. And no, I am not. I still fail to see what that has to do with our ideas of government.

[higanbana]

yes? i'm not new here, i know they're your actual ears

but they wiggle and also like. this you?



anyway my point is that since you're not from this world you were probably talking about a different system of government, is all. although with how you describe it maybe it isn't too far off lmao

[thaumewturge]

[. . .

You know, most people are terrified of Rhel. She thinks she prefers that to whatever this is.]

And how many people have called you out for being an unpleasant arse today, hm?

[Rhel tries very hard not to swear! She can get going and then there's no stopping her.

But.]

[higanbana]

ehehe. you would be the first!

which is actually shocking to me as well. gotta work harder i guess

[thaumewturge]

Ah, I see. My apologies, you're rather literate for a child.

[And Rhel just smiles the smile of a woman who is Fed Up and has decided that nah, she's just gonna be Aggressively Polite and end this conversation.]

Good day.

[higanbana]

[Ris wants to argue. She really, really does.

She is an adult, actually, thank you! Legally, even! And she is getting kind of sick of being treated like some little girl by people who haven't had to fend for themselves around here for better part of the past decade!

...But that just sounds more childish, doesn't it? So she'll just leave it where it is and go find someone else to make miserable instead. That'll help, right? Maybe?]

un: reallyfarflung; video

[areyuuserious]

Oh, without a doubt.

[thaumewturge]

At least with the government, they're required to appear useful else they risk revolt. I believe I've heard more convincing lies from my old students than what's in this notice.

[areyuuserious]

Haha, ouch. That's pretty telling. But, I've heard more convincing ones from not only classmates but also from Night Raven College's headmaster-- I'm sorry, headmage as he calls himself.

[... Pretty damning, really, but.]

[thaumewturge]

What--Oh, no, if I ask I'm likely to get annoyed, if that's what you have to say about whoever runs your school. But is it a school for magic?

[areyuuserious]

It is, yes. I, ah, ended up there by accident from another version of Earth and it's more than just a bit awkward since I don't really have the capability for it.

[thaumewturge]

None at all? Then how did you get there in the first place?

[areyuuserious]

[They shrug.]

Allegedly Crowley's at just as much of a loss as I am, but there's part of me that's buying that about as much as it's buying that he was looking for a way to send me home.

[thaumewturge]

Lovely.

[Not lovely.]

Has he tried teaching you any magic at all? Perhaps you're simply not skilled at the type taught there. I can't count the students I've had to suggest join a different guild when they showed no talent for thaumaturgy.

[areyuuserious]

Nobody's really tried teaching me, no. They've just been going off the word of some enchanted mirror that said I had nothing going for me in the way of potential.

Potions and the like are fine, but anyone who can follow directions can be capable with those, and I'm good at the theory, but...

[thaumewturge]

How are you at maths and details?

[areyuuserious]

I don't really like unnecessary math like measuring system conversions, but I'm at least decent at it. And I'm pretty good with details!

[thaumewturge]

If we were in Eorzea, I would suggest the arcanist guild. They work with "arcane geometries" and the like. They also summon adorable little carbuncles!

[areyuuserious]

Arcane geometries... If we were in Eorzea, I'd waste no time looking into it.

[A beat.]

What's a carbuncle?

[thaumewturge]

Oh, these adorable little...familiars, I suppose would be the best way to describe them? I hardly understand them myself, though one of my brothers is an arcanist and Alphinaud was one for the longest. Very cute, and I have always regretted being utterly unable to grasp arcamina.

[areyuuserious]

[Their first thought is a familiar sounds great, but then...]

... What's their behavior like? [Thaaaaat's important, after their experiences with Grim.]