kaisou | too cool for school; ota

Entry tags:

too cool for school; ota

WHO: Alberto Scorfano and ???
WHERE: Kaisou Middle School and nearby restaurants in Midtown
WHEN: First two weeks of school
WHAT: Alberto suffers unduly... though it's still mostly his fault.
WARNINGS: woof, yeah— eighth grade...

a. between classes / lunch
[ The forgetfulness brought on by the muses' creative influences really shoots him in the foot when Alberto starts attending school for the first time ever. Already he was going to struggle, but the fugue state this creative mania has left him in just spells trouble right away. Multiple times in his first week alone, he's snuck off on "bathroom breaks" to secretly explore the school, but then gotten lost in the halls and missed half his class. He's forgotten to do his homework, left his textbooks at home, forgot his backpack in his last classroom, you name it. And the hell with learning the teachers' names — or his classmates'... Everyone is "hey, you" for the first couple weeks. Now, mind you, none of this is at all unusual for Alberto in the first place. But it is unfortunate that the muses' enchantment happens to highlight the worst of his worries for his first impression at school.

Find him wandering the halls between classes (sometimes several minutes after class has started), searching for the same classrooms every day like it's the first day — maybe even holding his school map upside-down. Or perhaps he disturbs you on one of his frequent "bathroom" adventures, poking his nose in other classrooms and staff-only rooms snoopily; he can easily be found in all the places he's not supposed to be... Lunchtime is more enjoyable, though he's a little overwhelmed being in such a huge group of kids for the first time in his life. But he's thrilled to try all the human food in the cafeteria — probably their most enthusiastic diner... Though he also brings pasta from home every day because he's a bottomless pit — and in case he needs to share with a new friend, of course, should anyone come sit with him! Lunchtime is about the only time all day where things don't go wrong for him. ]

b. in the classroom
[ The rest of school is gonna be an uphill battle the rest of the year... He'd come in very hopeful and excited, but with some skewed expectations; it started to seem intimidating rather quickly, as he'd secretly feared it would. His best friend Luca once accused him of being too cowardly to go to human school — "you're just afraid you can't do it!" — and while that argument feels like a lifetime ago now, Luca wasn't completely off the mark back then. Alberto's extremely uncomfortable appearing ignorant, especially about human stuff (go figure, huh), so the whole first month strikes a deep, tender nerve, knocking new cracks in his armor of bravado every single day. He's drastically behind the modern American eighth grade learning level; that's the education a lifetime of isolation on an uninhabited island will get ya, I guess. Whether he volunteered or was called on, his answers in class often draw awkward pauses from the teachers and sniggers from some of the snottier kids, all day, all week. The unusual, Very Human™, and unfortunately eye-catching fashion sense he's developing doesn't do much to stave away potential bullies, and speckling himself with Sharpie doodle "tattoos" while distracted in class practically brands him as a Weird Kid right out the gate. Plus, uh, you know, all the weird things he says and does — more so that part, really... Middle school is tough, man. Especially when you're brazenly pretending to be human in another dimension in the future... Ahem.

Language Arts prompts a lot of mispronounced words and gaps in his vocabulary, showing off his terrible spelling and penmanship compared to most of his classmates; great way to start the morning, he loves it. Maths class is no less embarrassing, having been taught the most rudimentary arithmetic by his father and nothing more. His saving grace is Spanish class; he's already been informally studying Spanish for months, and it's come easily to his Italian mind. This is the only subject where he can actually give correct answers when called on; it's just enough of an ego boost to get him through the rest of the day. Because Science, fascinating as it is, proves even further beyond him than maths; if he didn't have science class with Luca, it'd be much more discouraging. Apart from Spanish, Social Studies piques his interest the most; but like with any other class, his strange responses and wild baseless guesses in class discussions keep building him a reputation amongst students and faculty alike. At the end of each day, Gym is a reprieve because he doesn't have to talk to anyone if he doesn't want to... He gets to move around finally, after sitting still (err, sort of) at his desk for hours on end... And he gets to smack people with volleyballs if he doesn't like them and say it was an accident. The only problem with Gym is that he's supposed to shower afterwards — no, thanks. He'd rather leave school smelling like fish. Like... sweaty fish... ]

c. detention / after school
[ But by far, Alberto's "favorite class...?" Detention. Alberto loves detention. Lucky for him! He seems to have a natural knack for it. Yes, yes, already in his first two weeks, he got issued detention... twice. For what? You'll have to ask him! On his first two Fridays, staying late for detention leaves him alone for the afternoon, so he decides to treat himself to restaurant food after school, something's he's never technically done before. But it's exactly the kind of soothing his spirit needs to bring him back to his vibrant, vivacious, vexing self after roughing it at school all week. Food is always where it's at for him.

Anyone out for a late lunch might notice a tall, freckled preteen boy all by himself looking a bit baffled and lost as he enters the restaurants, not really sure what to... do... He's winging it. His first Friday he can be found at the Madrigals' Colombian restaurant, Nuestra Casita, visiting alone for the first time as a real diner, so he's a little more careful to be polite on his own — since usually he's just trailing behind Bruno getting takeout... His second Friday, though, he tries Wanmin Restaurant. It's his first foray into Asian cuisine, just on a whim — and that whim led him right; it's incredible. He might even catch someone else's eye because he eats his meal with such, um... gusto... ~~No, it's gross, disgusting table decorum, omg child stop you're in public~~ ]

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[And at Wanmin restaurant, who happens to be enjoying her crystal shrimp and rice buns but Luz, with a schoolbook open as she was scribbling information. She looked up and saw Alberto, eagerly consuming his food with, well, less than stellar table manners, and he was getting some rather pointed looks from the other patrons.

Welp. It was a process. Luz put a bookmark where she'd been reading and walked over, food in hand].

Hola, Alberto! Wha'cha doing there?

[ Alberto gives a little start when Luz approaches him, having not expected it, but he's relieved to see her, honestly. It'd only been... y'know... a few hours... But he's already growing pretty irritated with how little talking is allowed in school, plus an hour in silence alone in detention (though he did admittedly enjoy that bit) — so Luz's company provides a welcome wave of relief.

He knows he's not human-ing very well right now — but there are no forks around, and he's never seen chopsticks before, sooo... Hands it had to be, as far as he knows. Not that he has a problem with that. But then he just got caught up in the deliciousness, so it's a good thing Luz is interrupting him not too long into his meal... When she asks "Wha'cha doing there," though, of course he tries to play it off suavely. ]

Oh— Hey, Luz. Just celebrating my detention...~ Again...~ Hah, two for two!

[ He shoots her a sly, knowing look with a sarcastic smile, and flashes the number two on each hand with a showy little snap of his fingers, canting his head playfully. They're only two weeks into the school year, man — off to a great start... He surely told her he'd gotten detention last Friday, too, when he wasn't able to leave with her and Luca and Amity — just like today. But with how busy they stay in class, he hasn't had the chance to explain why. At least he seems self-effacing and in good humors about it, but... I-Is that a good thing, ultimately? ]

[Luz had heard about the first detention, yes, but she figured that was bound to happen since he was still starting to grasp school and how it worked. It didn't make her happy of course, not helped by the fact that she didn't get to have classes with him since he was technically still in middle school and she was starting high school.

Luz does produce some chopsticks though, since she tended to have at least two on hand. She did look up at the other patrons and give a little shrug, as if to say he's getting the hang of things].

Wait, another detention? What'd you get that one for?

[Luz was not a perfect girl like Amity: she'd gotten her detentions in the past too, before she went to Hexside and learned how horrifying they were. Lucky that Alberto didn't need to deal with all of that. Let him have the boring one which didn't have an element of mortal peril].

[ If Alberto had to deal with detention at Hexside, he'd be much keener on learning good behavior. But as it were, he's here, and instead he rather enjoys detention, so it does very little to sway his behavior... Even once he gets the hang of all the ropes of human school, he's still the personality type who's gonna hear "Can I speak to you after class?" a lot from now on.

For now, he just sighs, propping himself up with his elbows on the table, chin cradled in his hands. He keeps that playful air about him, though, poking fun at himself for once. ]

I got trapped in a basement. Because of course I did. That would happen to me~

[ ghuidkjf...?! Th-This is definitely yet another "Alberto's leaving out key details in this picture" situation. "Getting trapped in a basement" is not a reason for detention... and how did he even manage that in the first place?! ]

[Oh yeah. Even someone as adventurous as Alberto would have had a problem with the kind of detention that Hexside students received. But she figured that maybe Alberto was still trying to find his footing in school, so detentions were likely just going to be a thing with him. She didn't necessarily WANT that, but then she hadn't wanted it for herself back home either.

Sometimes things were just like that. She did, however, show him how she ate with the chopsticks before continuing to talk].

The basement? Of the school?! How did you manage to do that?

[She was really trying to sound surprised/shocked, but her inflection gave away how very interested she was in this story. Yep, there was a reason these two were friends].

[ He watches her hands with the chopsticks, and starts to mimic her without comment. He loves that they just silently exchanged this little human-ing lesson without breaking their conversation to do it, or attracting attention to the fact that Alberto didn't know what he was doing... It reminds him of when Massimo taught him how to use a fork. And in fact, Alberto takes to the chopsticks rather well after playing with them a bit while he talks. ]

Okay, so— I went to the bathroom, with permission, but then while I was out, I didn't go to the bathroom, right... So I could explore a little first. I was only gonna explore the school for a couple minutes! Just to try and find my way around when the halls were empty!

[ No, he was snooping. Plain and simple. Luz knows him too well for that line. ]

But I went through this door, cuz it was open, but then it closed behind me and it locked... So I just kept going down the hall. There were some more doors, like cleaning stuff behind one door, and a machine behind another door, I dunno, I just kept opening doors, ha. Then I went out a different door and I went down some stairs. And some more stairs. Then ended up in a super dark room, full of boxes of food...?

[ As he continues his story, it's clearer and clear that the muses' charms have really done a number on Alberto the past couple weeks. He's way too creative to shoulder their influence and retain cogency... While this is typical Alberto stuff, it's true, there are other forces at play with his cognitive functions here. ]

A moment later, some guy happens to walk in, all like: "How did you get here?" And I'm just like, "I don't know...?!" Turns out I'm under the kitchen for the cafeteria...! But the guy wouldn't let me walk through the kitchen to get out, cuz he thought my shoes weren't good enough and he kept saying I was gonna slip... So he carried me through the kitchen on his back, and dropped me off in the cafeteria. Next to the lunchline. During lunch. In front of everyone.

[ He cants his head playfully again, feigning another sarcastic smile. The kind of smile that says "Kill me." ]

Anyway, I missed my whole class, my teacher didn't believe me when I tried to explain what happened, I got detention, and...? ...I never even got to go to the bathroom!

[ The whole time!!! He leans back and slaps the table in exaggerated exasperation, grinning at Luz with a strained stare as his tale comes to an end. Whatever story she knew was coming... it surely wasn't this. This could only happen to Alberto... Indeed, there's a reason these two are friends. And for Alberto's sake, with stories like this, thank goodness there is! ]

[Whoa. That was one HECK of a story. Luz was also pretty inclined to believe it, considering how curious Alberto was, and knew perfectly well it was something she would have done herself. Hadn't she also stumbled around the Boiling Isles and even Hexside, just so she could get an idea about what the place had to offer, and what else there was to see?

Alberto had never been in a school before, it was only natural he'd want to explore it! Granted, Luz didn't know that the Muses had a little to do with how he perceived things and how it dictated some of his actions].

At least you made it out safely! I don't know if I agree with you getting detention for getting lost, but I guess most teachers would argue that you should have just gone to the bathroom and come back, or asked directions at some point.

[Luz wouldn't have, past a certain point].

It is a cool story you can share with people now, at least.

[ It's par for the course stuff for those who know Alberto. But for teachers who've just met him but are already getting a grasp of how unruly he is, him coming back with an elaborate story just registered as a lie, the way liars build on more and more specific details to "prove" it's true. ...Which Alberto is also well-practiced at, and his brand of charisma kinda... evokes that impression... even if he recently truly has stopped lying as much as he used to! But these teachers don't know that yet. Nor that he's never been in a school in his life. And indeed: he should have just gone to the bathroom.

Alberto takes an almost rhetorical bite of his food, getting the hang of the chopsticks sort of. His table manners still aren't great, though, and he still talks with his mouth full; sorry, Luz... ]

I guess it's a better story than sitting quietly in the same spot for an hour.

[ He narrows his eyes with a dubious look, and points his chopsticks at Luz, always gesturing as he speaks even with props, clicking the tips for emphasis. ]

That's the worst part of school. The sitting. I don't know how you've done this your whole life, Luz. I'd run away.

[ ...Oof, he's joking, even if he probably would too, but still— oof. ]

[Luz would wonder why Alberto didn't JUST tell the teachers he'd been home schooled so they'd know he was a little behind, but obviously she'd have to be reminded this was not Albertos style. He was, after all, more of a "fake it 'till you make it" kind of guy, and his lying had honestly gotten him to fool quite a few people.

But obviously, Luz didn't want things to be too rocky for him, because that might put him off of school altogether. Luz was thinking enough about that, Alberto eating with his mouth open barely phased her].

You do want to avoid going to detention too much. Otherwise, adults will think you're a troublemaker. That's not too bad unless you run into a bully, and then it'll be much harder getting people to believe you.

[Luz nibbled, then snickered at his next declaration].

Oh, believe me, I won't argue with you there! When I was younger I couldn't sit still either! That takes some getting used to!

[Luz was neurodivergent with slight ADD, but that bit of information wouldn't do a lick of good for Alberto to know, so she just wanted to assure him he could learn to sit still eventually].