open | pumpkins scream in the dead of night 🎃

[ornamentals]

WHO: Everyone!
WHERE: Persephone's Cottage (also known as, That Weird Farm Cult)
WHEN: Mid-October (before 10/15)
WHAT: Fun Halloween-themed activities put on by the Cottage crew to ring in the spooky season.
WARNINGS: None, excluding Kni's usual sour attitude.

[halloween is just around the corner, bringing with it a fine autumn chill and trees shedding their summer greens for warm oranges and reds. there's plenty to do in the city to celebrate the changing into a much more spookier season, but the festivities certainly don't end at the city limits!

the residents of persephone's cottage have, in the spirit of the season, put on their own fun activities for anyone visiting. it's a collaborative effort from everyone, but some are just a little more excited than others to be hosting fun autumnal activities for friends and not-yet-friends alike.

while the cottage is always decked out for halloween (thank you goodwill), at least now it's seasonally appropriate. pumpkins of various sizes and shades of orange sit everywhere as you come up to the property. closer to the cottage more and more of those pumpkins are carved with fun, fangy smiles and sinister eyes. there are so many of these carved pumpkins, in fact, that there is a table dedicated to them with a sign resting against one of the legs that just says 'FREE'.

inside the free jack o' lanterns is a surprise - could be candy, coins, or a fortune / misfortune cookie. if you're really lucky, some of the jack o'lanterns even have chicken eggs inside.

next to that table is another table, this one laid out with platters of apple and pumpkin baked goods, as well as shucked corn and other vegetables ready to be roasted over the bonfire nearby as the sun starts to set. there are also marshmallows and mugs of warm cider and hot cocoa ready to be enjoyed by the fire, and for those old enough to drink it, ask any of the adults for a cup of moonshine.

there are hand-painted signs sprinkled around the property pointing in the directions of all the activities one can find:

- the apple orchard, where various sizes of worn baskets and a random variety of reusable totes sit near the entrance for people to pick their own fruit. it isn't limited to just the apples, but any of the fruit trees they have growing despite most being way out of season.

- a corn maze with rumpled pumpkin-headed scarecrows littered throughout the corn, some of which are sporting familiar clothes that some of the cottage residents may recognize as their own, like a certain long, bullet-riddled red jacket...

- carve your own pumpkin station (where you can sit in silence alongside kni, if you choose to) and make your own funky faced jack o'lantern.

also in the spirit of halloween, almost all of the pokemon and even a few of the chickens are dressed in some kind of costume variations from orange and black and purple ribbons to little hats and bat wings and whatnot.

before anyone can leave, they will be offered (heavily encouraged) to take home a crate of various vegetables and fruits, on top of everything else they may have picked themselves.]

Comments

[whiteshroud]

That's what the timer says! You can look at it if you don't believe me.

[Meanwhile Jun is feeling more and more chipper, chuckling softly to himself as he follows along. His german skills have grown enough where he knows exactly what Varian says]

Because it's fun and there's a lot of them. Plus it's so tall that it's hard to see over!

[But ah yes, the dead end. It's at this point, Jun will decide to point the obvious out]

You know... Kni and Vash are pretty good at math. So what's to say they didn't keep the algorithm in mind when they designed this?

[droptheious]

I don't need to look at the timer! It's just - I didn't know it was that far in already.

[Normally, he would be so touched at how far Jun's German skills have come. Later on, he might actually take a moment to appreciate that. Right now, however, he's too busy being huffy about this entire experience. ]

It's not funny. And yes, they ARE tall! But-

[ Vash. ]

VASH is tall!!! [ He says as if this is a sudden revelation. ] Of COURSE he messed with the math because he could just look over the top of the corn as he did it! And Kni would be able to help him mess with it too! Oh my god, that's so RUDE!

[He's gonna turn and stomp along another route, eventually pausing at the crossroads again, tapping his foot in annoyance. ]

I know there's an easy way out of this.

[whiteshroud]

Time flies when you're in the corn.

[Or something like that. Jun is just having the time of his life right now]

It's pretty funny. [Not even going deny that he's enjoying himself]

How's that rude? Are you saying that he made the puzzle too hard for you to solve? I thought you liked a little challenge, and that's what they brought you!

[droptheious]

[ The joke makes Varian stop, to slowly turn his head to give his partner a pointed LOOK. He stares at him in silence for a few beats, before continuing to stomp his way off in a random direction to try and find a way out of here. ]

I am not saying that, no. I just said he was messing with the math and that's rude. He hasn't beaten me yet, I'm not gonna let him beat me! I can outthink him. I will not let a man that gets emotional at commercials beat me at math.

[ He's taking another way through, muttering to himself. ]

I could use my earth abilities to just move the plants but noooo, that's what he wants. I'm not giving him what he wants. I'm gonna win this the right way.

[whiteshroud]

[Jun's smile doesn't even waver through that pointed look. He's used to this and he's having the time of his life here. ]

Hey, I think it's nice how in touch Vash is with his emotions. Buuut does this mean if the maze does beat you, that means Vash is better at math?

[He says, continuing to cause more chaos]

I'm pretty sure Vash isn't a mastermind, my love. He just wanted to make a challenging maze for people.

[droptheious]

[ This is just a great time for Jun while Varian wants to set the whole place on fire. He'd been muttering to himself as he was stomping on, but then Jun had to just go and pour a little gasoline on the fire just for funsies. He stops DEAD. ]

Excuse me? Did I say that as part of the maze stipulations? I did not. I have never said Vash is better at math!

[ Vash is, absolutely, better at math. Vash can do math at speed levels Varian can only dream of. But Varian is deeply competitive and he's already fired up, and this feels like an additional challenge onto the one they're currently going through.

Okay, back to stomping through the maze.]

Maybe he's been fooling us for years and he's finally showing us his true colours. You don't know. [ Oh look, it's another dead end!]

Scheißdreck!!!! [ Oh good, we're yelling now! ] This is NONSENSE!!!

[whiteshroud]

Yeah but if you can't beat his maze isn't it implied....

[But ah we reached yelling. This is truly a great night. Jun is so glad they did this]

I mean, I guess he is an alien and aliens do love crop circles. But I really don't think he has a malicious bone in his body.

[Ah another dead end!] Pretty sure we've hit this one before. [He'll pull out his phone] Ah, 28 minutes left.

[asipofbride]

[ something wicked this way comes.

There's a rustling in the corn, just barely audible especially under Varian's general... Excitement. It thumps, it shifts, it's drawing nearer and nearer--and then the stalks part as a little black head pokes out from the corn wall. ]

Y'all good in here? Oh, hey mintsprog.

[droptheious]

It is not implied, Nightroad! It's not even implied slightly! And what do you mean about corn and aliens? What does that have to do with -

[ He doesn't hear the coming thumping. The gallumping sound on an incoming pinniped- he's too mad at his beloved right now. ]

We have NOT this this one before- and wh- NO? It's not that much time left, I- [ oh, there's Wolfwood, Wolfwood is here now ] ARRGGGH!!!

[ He still has hold of Jun's hand, and for a brief, insane moment of pure instinct, he'll pull Jun behind him - despite the fact Jun is significantly the better fighter out of both of them. And then the seal speaketh.]

...WOLFWOOD?

[whiteshroud]

[Jun lets himself be pulled behind him because he can sense that it's Wolfwood coming through the corn- ergo no threat what so ever. Instead he's grinning as he waves to the other man... seal]

Hey Wolfwood!

We're fine. Varian is just trying to solve the corn maze without help. The yelling is part of the process!

[asipofbride]

[ he lifts a flipper in a friendly return wave, blinking at Varian as the man engages in the bright yodelling solo of his people, glancing between Jun and his man with a certain sort of perturbed pinnipedal interest. ]

Usually we try to check in if there's too much hollering just in case, sooo... Y'all want a. Rescue flare? Or.

[ the whites of his little eyes flickers a little back and forth. ]

The process. I'm not smoking enough for the process.

[droptheious]

[ Varian just needs a moment. He wasn't expecting anything spooky to happen in this spooky Halloween maze. Largely because he knows Kni and Vash made this and while Kni would absolutely have put spooky things in it, Vash would have made sad noises about it and had them removed. So he was expecting just a normal maze made of corn.

Now, fundamentally, there is nothing frightening about a talking seal. And now he realises it is, indeed, Wolfwood, Varian releases the tension in his shoulders. ]

We do not need a rescue flare. I've got this. I don't need any help!

[ He glowers at Jun a bit. ]

What process?? I'm NOT yelling! [ He is yelling. He's yelling a lot. He looks back at Wolfwood. ]

Okay no. I need to know. Why- why are you a seal right now? Why is this a thing? Right now? In the corn?

[whiteshroud]

[He snorts a little. He's not surprised at all that Varian refuses the flare]

We're okay. If we need to leave, I can fly or teleport us out of here.

[They are extremely safe, in other words. Either they will get out of here by Varian finding the way, or Varian will wear himself out and Jun will carry him out of here with ease]

Because sometimes he's a seal, Var.

[asipofbride]

[ have you ever seen a seal look affronted?

His little brows furrow and gives Varian the Stankiest of eyes. ]

I turn into a seal when I get wet, kiddo. I don't exactly choose when I'm a seal but I still gotta make sure people ain't turning to cannibalism in my cornfield.

[ huff, puff, and then Varian's getting the butt... Because Wolfwood can fold himself backwards and look at them all the same. ]

You wanna be rude about anything else or should I leave you to not solvin' the maze in peace?

[droptheious]

We don't need any of that to leave, Jun, because I am going to beat this maze myself!

[He is absolutely going to tucker himself out and Jun will have to teleport them home.

Varian does, at least, look a little abashed at the fact he's insulted Wolfwood. ]

Oh. Sorry. I didn't realise that. I thought you were just... being a seal. In corn.

[ Wow, he's just getting the whole butt! ]

I'm GOING to solve the maze! Why does everyone keep saying I'm not gonna do it? I just need to be able to look at figure it out is all!

[whiteshroud]

[He'll scratch his jaw, giving Varian a handsqueeze with his other hand. It's okay]

Sorry, he doesn't mean anything by it. He's just a little heated right now. It's a bit like when Vash gets really into his feelings over small things.

[Just with babygirl anger rather than babygirl crying. ]

Hey, we're not saying you CAN'T. Just setting precautions just in case.

[asipofbride]

Joke's on you, Vash is in his feelings regardless. The beanpole doesn't leave his feelings. He owns property there.

[ the seal remains insulted but some of the spite is leaving him... Not enough to keep him from being a bastard, but, y'know. Some. Un picante. ]

Considerin' you're walking back into a pair of dead ends, I worry for you.[ he sounds very smug for someone who's worried. He may also be lying as part of his seal wrath. ]

Anyway, I'll save some cocoa for ya'll. Don't die.

[ and galumph, galumph, galumph he goes, rustling into the darkness. ]

[droptheious]

[ The hand squeeze does soothe some of Varian's ruffled feathers, and he lets out a low, slow breath.]

I'm not - okay, maybe I'm into my feelings a little bit, but I'm fine, I'm handling it.

[ He looks the way they're heading, towards the dead ends Wolfwood has mentioned. His eye twitches. He's clearly handling this just great. ]

They're not- no?? They can't be dead ends! Then they'll all be dead ends!!!

[Varian has lost track of everywhere they've been, they cannot all be dead ends. He's just lost and refusing to admit it. He watches as Wolfwood galumphs away, yelling back at him. ]

YEAH!!! WELL!!! THANK YOU FOR THE COCOA!!!

[whiteshroud]

Ohhh, cocoa! Thanks Wolfwood, I'm looking forward to that!

[He'll wave the seal off as he goes galumph into the darkness before looking back at his partner]

Well, only one way to find out if he's telling the truth. You still want to lead us through this right? Without any help?

[droptheious]

[ Varian's eye twitches, just the once. ]

Yes, Darling. [ That's said through gritted teeth. ] I still want to do this. I don't need help. But that - that seal interval is being shaved off my time, as that was beyond my control, and it's not fair the distraction is taken against me.

[whiteshroud]

Hmm... nope. It still counts.

It's a Halloween-based corn maze, it's expected there'll be distractions meant to throw people off. So I don't see why a seal one should get off your time.

I mean, when Seal Knights time their labyrinth runs, we don't shave off the time we spent fighting Greed to our total time. So why should you get special treatment-- unless you're admitting you need kid gloves compared to me?

[droptheious]

How is a SEAL anywhere near Halloween themed, Jun? You tell me what is Halloween themed about a seal and you tell me right now!

[ He raises his free hand to point a pointy finger at his beloved, the love of his life, the centre of his universe. ]

I see what you're doing, you little sneak. I can see what you're doing. I know what you're up to. You've got that smile you get when you're messing with me. I see it. But you won't get me, I'm not gonna fall for it. I'm not admitting anything!

[They're back to walking, still hand in hand, muttered under his breath: ]

Du kleiner Scheißer

[whiteshroud]

Halloween and Selkies both have strong celtic roots! In that sense, they're basically siblings to one another. There's plenty of creepy stories involving selkie too.

[SO. THERE.]

Hey, I'm smiling because I'm having a good time with you, Var. Aren't you having a good time too?

[He snorts, hearing that muttering]

Ich liebe dich auch, mein Schatz.

[droptheious]

[ Varian knows that he shouldn't indulge in his partner's "creepy stories" - he knows Jun's line between "creepy" and "nightmare inducing" is non-existent. But he's irritated and he wants to prove a point, so:]

Okay, you tell me one of the creepy stories and I'll decide if it's appropriately Halloween-y enough.

[He casts his fiancee a squinting look. ]

Fine. I am having a good time with you, I always have a good time with you. But I'll have a better time when I beat this maze and prove you wrong. Then I'll have a fantastic time.

[ Oh yeah. Jun knows German. Because he literally taught him that. Varian heaves out a soft little sigh, giving Jun's hand a squeeze as they walk. ]

ごめんね。愛してるよ、最愛の人. But that does not change my correct assessment that you're messing with me on purpose.

CW: GRAPHIC BODILY HARM

[whiteshroud]

[Really the content warning should be enough to give away how much of a mistake Varian made here, because he has a story armed and loaded]

Alright, well you know how if you hide a selkie's pelt, they can't return to their seal form and have to marry you? Well there was one selkie who a man tried it to, but she was so determined to get back to the ocean to see her kids, that she decided to wear his skin instead.

[ : ) how's that for creepy]

Haha, it's okay. And I assure you, I've done absolutely nothing to help or hinder you- per your request.