kaisou | video; un: doordasher

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video; un: doordasher

WHO: Hermes
WHERE: Network: Libra
WHEN: Very end of June
WHAT: Announcement from HERMES
WARNINGS: None

What is UP everybody? Did you miss me? I missed me.

[What.]

Sort of. Anyways! Hi. Hermes here.

And I gotta say like, that Birthday Skeleton guy? Scared the crap out of me! But he was so chill! Ominous, but chill. Kinda like Charon but without the - [They hold their arms out like a stereotypical zombie.] - uuuUUGHHHnnnn! stuff, y'know?

So - like - checkthisout!!

[Hermes plops the camera down, on a convenient table or chair or something. Not important. They're also holding the brick boomerang Persephone gave them last year. Winding it up to...]

[Why are they throwing it at themselves?]

[But not to worry! It somehow bounces off their face, like it hit some kind of invisible barrier. And falls harmlessly to the ground. Hermes just plain beams, throwing the camera thumbs up with both hands.]

I'm invincible!!

[They take a step forward to fully flex on their excited pose and... stub their toe on the brick. Hermes yelps, and flops forward to shut the camera off.]

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I am aware of what is involved. I have never really been one for... so much social gathering. I am content with it passing with little fanfare.

That's-

...Actually a good point. From what I understand, our world is paused, while we are trapped here. And while your Hermes memories are still in there, we are also not connected to our home world, currently. It is possible that it might affect them. Perhaps you'll have more time? Perhaps they will not start until we return back to where we belong.

There is so much we don't know about the process. [ No. She remembers what Calliope told her. ] There is so much we don't remember about it. It's something of an unknown even back home. Here? Doubly so.

what about cake tho?? huh i made a good point? AWESOME!! thats cooler than like anything else you just said which i totally read remember? it makes us forget?

I'm largely ambivalent.

You did. Incredibly, it seems even you can manage it once in a while. And yes. I'm sure you did.

I spoke to Calliope about it in the Underworld. After so many lives lived, things start to get... lost. Reflections of reflections, is how she put it.

what about like pie?? or donuts? OH OH those little french cookie and cream things??? moroccos?

[... They mean macrons.]

oh yeah that thats def a way to find stuff out huh? but maybe ur right and we dont really have to worry about being double reflections here?

Macrons. And again, largely ambivalent. They are a pleasant enough treat, but I'm not going to go out of my way to get some. I certainly don't see them as a vital part of a celebration. Though... admittedly, celebrations aren't really something I care much for anyway.

[Celebrations mean a lot of people, and Persephone much prefers her own company. ]

That is the hope. I have been in this realm for a while now, and not notice anything that should raise concern. Perhaps we can just... exist here for a while.

ok then what DO you like for a idk fun pastry??? not even like birthday pastry but 'oh man i gotta treat myself'? cause like i like a lot of stuff so im curious that thatd be cool real cool :)

Hermes, if I want to treat myself, I do it with a glass of well-aged bourbon.

[Sorry Hermes, she is allergic to fun and that includes pastries. ]

That does not surprise me in the least. You are certainly more... outgoing between the two of us.

Hah. It would be a break if nothing else, though I do miss my Underworld. I've only just gotten it back, after all.

ohhhh ok whats "well aged" mean???

[Are they planning something? Yes. But shhh.]

lol i know but thats cool cause i know U like ME like this arent u like queen of landlords or something here? i know its not the UNDERWORLD beleiev me i kno but thats... something yea??

It means that it has had time without being drunk. Usually a few years. It lends to a deeper, richer flavour.

Yes, despite myself, I do indeed, like you like this.

I mean.
Yes. It is something. And I have my own realm here now. But I still miss my kingdom. It had taken me a thousand years to get it back, and it's rather a sore spot that I have been torn away from my throne once again.

so... the older it is the better it is? AWWWW :D :D :D dont worry im not gonna tell yeah i know its not much yeah?? but like i guess its better than nothing is what im trying to say?

Yes, exactly that. Often more expensive, too.

I'm going to pretend I don't see the emojis for my own sanity.

That is a fair way to put it, I suppose. And I am close to the people I have here. They mean... a lot to me.

ohhhhh ok more expensive is........ better? aw you mean a lot to them too :) i can say that cause like i hope im one of them lol

Not always, despite what capitalism might tell you. But with bourbon? Yes.

I'm sure I do. It is... a comfort, I suppose. I am not used to being... wanted by people.

[ After all, most of the Idols did their very best to avoid her- from pity before she murdered Hades and from fear after. It's nice not to have that. She still doesn't quite know how to process it. ]

Of course you are one of them, Hermes. You are my family.

...Not in the derogatory way.

lmaaaaaaaaaaaao capitalism booooo but ok cool good 2 know about the alcohol really?? i thought like people used to worship you and stuff

["and stuff" jfc Hermes do you know anything about your own family lore.]

awwwwwwwwwwwwwww youre gonna make me get all gross and sappy :) :)

Yes, of everything humanity created, I feel that was the greatest mistake.

Oh they did. They still do, in fact. I even have a shrine in this world that Vash keeps for me. But being worshipped isn't the same as being wanted. When people worship you, they want something from you, generally. They want my strength, they want me to bless their crops or ensure their loved one passes into the Underworld safely.

It is very different to wanting my company.

I will turn this message off if you start.

really?? nobody just wanted to thank you or say 'hey persephone good job on plants'? like EVER?? dude that sucks so much :( ok ok ok before u turn it off tho? u can totally hang out with me whenevs!!! ill try and like chill out but i mean if u wanna like just watch movies or reeeeeeeeally trash tv?? i can totally be quiet for that stuff

My mother did. But I do not expect that is the same. Calliope too. But... well.

[ She's gone. And she's never coming back. Even if her eidolon lives on in Freddie, the version of Calliope she loved so much is gone. Forever. ]

But it is what it is, I have gotten used to it. And now I need to learn to get used to the opposite. I supposed this world is good for that.

[ Hermes can't hear it, but this pulls a laugh out of her. ]

...Alright, I suppose I can indulge in a little time with you. I suppose you have earned that much.

oh uh im sorry - didnt mean to dig into that yah!! variety and spice! all that kinda stuff!! oh man i wonder what kinda spice it is maybe cinnamon ?? YESSSSS omg ok i am SO STOKED

Do not worry, I know you meant no harm. The pains of my past are my own.

[ Because god forbid she sit down and talk about how she really feels about all of it - not what she can rage at people instead!!! Healthy growth? Not for her!]

Are... you asking if the spice of this world is... cinnamon?

I'm sure you are. When would you like us to meet?

i mean if u wanna talk ? about it? i reeeeeally dunno if i can do anything but i can sit there and nod a lot

[They are. Trying. They don't really think Persephone will take them up on the offer, but they've got to at least try.]

yeah! cinnamon is a spice right lol oh oh uhhhh i dunno um i didnt think u were gonna say yes so fast

Perhaps another time.

[ What if she holds her sadness in her chest for all eternity, Hermes? What if she just does that?]

Yes, Hermes, cinnamon in a spice, you are correct.

May that be a lesson to you. I know I have a date night with Ana coming up, so how about some times after that? When you are free?

[ You know, after the ends up being stuck dealing with the cottage idiots playing a game of Jumanji and dragging her along for the ride. ]

[SOUNDS BAD, BRO.]

ok cool so then maybe thats the spice of life! cause otherwise youd like burn your mouth OHHHHHHHH REALLY??? what are you guys gonna do?? i still gotta meet her u know!!

[ It's fine, she's tough. She can handle it!!! ]

Cinnamon is the spice of life. That... may be something you have to bring to the network at large.

[ Because if she has to read that with her own eyeballs, then other people do too. ]

We will sit and talk. And yes, I know, I will try to organise something.

[PRESS X TO DOUBT]

oh yah maybe!! on one of those big post things that get posted instead of liiiike asking people about their parents man that was messed up can i can i meet her before ur date? maybe????

Oh, the Zodiac posts. Yes that would be ideal.
I believe the Zodiac staff member who made that particular faux pas felt the weight of the entire app on herself. Well deserved, if you ask me.

...I suppose that is acceptable.

u got it!! man maybe theyd let me write the questions id do SUCH a good job lol waaaaaaaaaaay better than that person i mean not like its HARD YES YES YESSSSSSS ok no no i i will be SO NORMAL about it!! So normal!!

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video; un: doordasher

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