[TEXT] UN: MUSICOLOGYMINOR

[youwouldntdownloada]

WHO: Yasuho and the App
WHERE: ONLINE
WHEN: Late March
WHAT: Enough is Enough with the Rapunzel Shampoo! ...Also, Macaroni Ice Cream,
WARNINGS: None

[UN: MUSICOLOGYMINOR - March 29]

Looking for advice- how do you make sure you've got the right bottle in the shower if the bottle keeps mysteriously replacing itself? I've put this shampoo bottle back in the cabinet four times now, and I don't want to accidentally use it again.

I can't be the only one with this problem.

[something Happened here,]

[CLOSED - Direct Message to CR]

Hey-

The Goodwill gave me a tub of macaroni and cheese flavored ice cream.

Want to try it?

[If she knows you, and she knows you're willing to try Weird Foods- congrats! You got this message.]

[UN: MUSICOLOGYMINOR - A Day After The First Prompt]

Good news! Scrap the question about the bottle, I found out what happened.

Bad news:

[Behold a picture of a three tailed fox! With so much hair. Maybe it's not even a fox, just a giant mass of orange fur. It's a mystery.]

Who has experience shaving animals, we're afraid to see what happens when she turns back.

Comments

Action

[prunedworlds]

"You know, it probably wouldn't be too hard to at least cut it shorter, right?"

So says the pile of fur. Who is otherwise just kind of. laying there. pathetically. It's kind of hard to even move like this...

[youwouldntdownloada]

Yasuho just squints. She does, to be fair, have a sword in hand.

"...I can't actually tell where you are in there is the problem..."

[prunedworlds]

There's some movement as Ritsuka tries to turn towards the voice, not that she can even really see through all the fur. For that matter, even with the movement it's probably hard to pinpoint exactly where her head is.

"Just start cutting off the stuff further away?"

[youwouldntdownloada]

Oh this is.

The worst.

Yasuho breathes in deep, and slowly picks up a chunk of fur. "Okay.... ...What should we even do with all of this? I'm half curious if you can turn any type of fur into yarn at this point..."

Answer, alarmingly: Yes! They can't well use Yasuho's hair, but weirdly enough it...works. It'll work.

Technically they could do it with Yasuho's hair too, but neither result will be especially cozy.

[prunedworlds]

It might be a lot of work, but if Yasuho wants to try her hand at spinning yarn, might be worth a try.

"I dunno, but otherwise it'd just have to be thrown out, right?"

At least Ritsuka can't help but mostly hold still? So it shouldn't be too hard to simply grab some fur and follow it to the end...

[youwouldntdownloada]

"It would, and I've already pretty much reached the social limit using mine, so hopefully this works..."

And hopefully cutting it works too. Snnnnssht. There goes...one massive chunk? It doesn't look very massive.

...

"Marco-"

Say Polo or she'll be So Upset.

[prunedworlds]

"Why were you still hanging on to that shampoo, anyway?"

You know, besides providing a temptation for people like Ritsuka to pull pranks with it. And massive is relative, given that there's more fur here than fox several times over.

"... Huh?"

Sorry Yasuho, she's a little too preoccupied to be sure she even heard that right.

[youwouldntdownloada]

"Because every time I threw it out it appeared on my counter," she absently answers, having taken the moment of conversation to find another patch of fur that was decidedly silent.

"...Nothing, I was just trying to find where you were again. It's muffled, but I can kind of hear you through it at least..."

[prunedworlds]

"Huh. I wonder if you could just pour it down the drain..."

Surely there must be some way to get rid of unwanted magic shampoo, right?

"Oh. Right. I can't really see where you are either so I've been staying in one spot..."

That, and it's also pretty difficult to move at the moment, with all that extra-long fur everywhere. Even just lifting her head takes some effort!

[youwouldntdownloada]

"I don't want to picture what kinds of creatures would come of that. We'd probably start seeing reports of...strange...long-haired rats or something."

It's terrifying they can't be responsible for that. But oh, hey!!! "That's helpful at least- I'll still need you to say something every now and then just so that I'm sure though...I still can't precisely figure out where you are, I think it's going to take a few more cuts before it's possible."

[prunedworlds]

"I dunno, if it's just normal rats with long fur that's not so bad..."

Ritsuka's standards for what makes a terrifying monster are uh. Something. In any case though, she's just gonna... lie down as best she can for now, head resting on her forelegs. Or the mass of fur in the vicinity of her forelegs, if we're getting technical. Not that it's really possible to tell right now.

"So... what do you want to talk about, then?"

That seems the easiest way, rather than thinking of things to say on the spot.

[youwouldntdownloada]

"Not really..?! That would cause so many problems for the pipe systems!"

Yasuho's standards are apparently taking a dive as well.

"Well, if we aren't going to just take tries at Marco Polo...how are things where you're staying? I try to keep taps on what's happening on the app, but half of what's been going on is something I was explicitly told not to look at."

Which, fair.

[prunedworlds]

"If they were already inside I guess..."

Though really, don't rats hang out more in storm drain 'sewers' than real sewers, anyway?

"Oh, I've been fine." Nothing unusual to report beyond the fae stuff that hit almost everyone. Though, hang on a minute... "Wait, what aren't you supposed to look at?"

[youwouldntdownloada]

That's just as bad that's just as bad-

"It'd just be a mess, trust me..." Snip snip-

"Oh..." Ah, well. "Apparently there were some uh. Dangerous? Discussions happening on the app? The kind of thing that it's easier to stay out of if you don't see it."

Snip-

[prunedworlds]

"I suppose..."

Look you have to understand compared to the kinds of monsters Ritsuka's used to dealing with, extra-hairy rats don't sound too bad.

"... Oh, I think I know what you mean." She probably shouldn't say what it was then, huh. Still, though, there's one kinda important thing. "You know to be careful of the Black Order though, right?"

[youwouldntdownloada]

"That part....yes." Though she does pause mid slice of another mass cluster of fur. "...Though how I'm supposed to even identify someone from that group is another story..."

[prunedworlds]

"Oh, they'll probably be posting and announcing themselves if more show up? And if not I bet someone else will tell everyone... Though I guess if you're still not supposed to look at that, you can have someone else let you know."

Like her. Ritsuka has absolutely no one forbidding her from looking at or even responding to those posts, for better or worse.

[youwouldntdownloada]

That, she waves off- much as the motion is hard to see.

"It's not forbidding, it was advising- Shio's a friend, not...a parent or something, god that's weird to think about..."

The woman coughs, cutting another bunch of fur. There's so much, she really needs to figure out what to do with this... "Are they really just doing that, announcing each other on the app? Not exactly...stealthy, is it?"

Say you think they're stupid without saying you think they're stupid, Yasuho,

[prunedworlds]

"Well the last one to show up announced herself, really. But if they end up on the app, Zodiac always announces new people every couple weeks anyway, so it wouldn't be hard to figure out, either."

Teresa may not have been the brightest though, admittedly. Even Ritsuka hadn't considered her a threat in that regard, just in terms of power.

"But I mean... After everything that happened, if they send more like her... Well, you should probably make sure you have a safe place to stay, just in case things get bad?"

[youwouldntdownloada]

wH-OOPS-

Yasuho nearly slips with the sword at that mention. She turns, and blinks slowly at the fox. Or at least, the rough estimate of where the fox is.

There is really, really, just so much fur-

"...You think I would end up in trouble?" She sort of thought the advice given to her was to keep her away from ever running that risk.

...then again it was a warning received before she had a great big tail and breathed holy fire. "....How 'safe' is safe here?"

She's not sure hiding in her teapot quite works out here.

[prunedworlds]

"I think everyone might be in trouble. Even if you didn't do anything, just being here, and being on the app, and so on..."

It didn't take a genius to figure out that it had probably been another app user who'd killed Teresa. And the way other people had acted when her death was announced couldn't have helped.

"And I guess... You can't really fight, right? Not like some of the people here? Having someplace you can go to stay that's protected, or even just knowing people you'll be around much who can handle things should help."

Hiding in the teapot is an option, but it's not ideal if the teapot itself is unguarded.

[youwouldntdownloada]

"I've been getting better but I wouldn't say I'm that good, no..." Part of her wonders if she should ask Kafka for advice, but part of her also wants to continue not knowing what Kafka is capable of in full.

Someplace to go that was protected though...

"...I can't even be sure most of us have something like that." Though she's starting to regret not having a roommate though. "I'm almost wishing I could hide in Hyrule until everything is over now..."

She'd make great map progress that way at least...

[prunedworlds]

"I think if there's trouble, the people who have more protected places will let others know they can go there, like what happened last November."

At least most app users could be relied on to band together.

"But it really wouldn't hurt to have a plan in place, just in case. You probably know plenty of other people here, right? You could ask them, too."

[youwouldntdownloada]

"I know.................a few..."

Honestly she feels like calling Shio up and asking if he's safe-

"...Is it ethically wrong to ask your boss and coworkers if they have safehouses..?"

Does Ritsuka even know who those people are?

[prunedworlds]

"If they're on the app, it's probably fine?"

Whether she knows about working for Gil or not, she doesn't really know Yasuho's coworker, so.

"Hopefully you don't need something like that soon though." Or ever. "It's just... Most likely things are gonna get worse. And back at Chaldea, at least I could usually call on the Servants for help if I needed, but here... I should be fine getting away to someplace safe if I have to, but I can't really protect anyone else."