Mirabel Madrigal (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
nonmagical) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
kaisou2022-03-18 08:23 am
nonmagical) wrote in kaisou2022-03-18 08:23 am
Entry tags:
Text, un: Mariposa
WHO: Mirabel and the network
WHERE: In her room
WHEN: A few days after the event, late at night
WHAT: Mirabel has some questions
WARNINGS: Maybe near death mention? Possession talk.
[It’s been a few days since the fae realm ordeal. Mirabel’s learned a few things. One, she’s still furry. Two, she can’t sleep. Not after… everything that happened. She doesn’t want to talk about it, not really. But she really needs to sleep. So she has a late night question for the network.]
I’m having problems falling asleep. Either I can’t fall asleep or I keep having nightmares. Is there something I can do so I can get some sleep?
[And then she has another question. She’s very careful about asking this one, so she locks her second question from the rest of her family.]
So I’ve been reading up on possession. [A lie.] It seems like a pretty scary thing to go through. Can anyone tell me more about it? Like… what happens if it happens to you?
[A pretty innocent question, right? She hopes no one sees right through it.]
WHERE: In her room
WHEN: A few days after the event, late at night
WHAT: Mirabel has some questions
WARNINGS: Maybe near death mention? Possession talk.
[It’s been a few days since the fae realm ordeal. Mirabel’s learned a few things. One, she’s still furry. Two, she can’t sleep. Not after… everything that happened. She doesn’t want to talk about it, not really. But she really needs to sleep. So she has a late night question for the network.]
I’m having problems falling asleep. Either I can’t fall asleep or I keep having nightmares. Is there something I can do so I can get some sleep?
[And then she has another question. She’s very careful about asking this one, so she locks her second question from the rest of her family.]
So I’ve been reading up on possession. [A lie.] It seems like a pretty scary thing to go through. Can anyone tell me more about it? Like… what happens if it happens to you?
[A pretty innocent question, right? She hopes no one sees right through it.]
text, un: Mariposa
text, un: miyako
text, un: Mariposa, private
It'd hurt them. Really badly.
text, un: miyako, private
[ In a strange way she does. She gets it. When she became a Chosen Child it was something she kept secret from her family. Eventually it would get out when they had to travel the world on Christmas, but she knows the worry of showing something scary to her family.
It's not her she thinks of, however, and instead she thinks of Ken. And for a moment, longer than she'd like, she's quiet. Without Hawkmon here to help her keep her calm, it's harder to phrase things without meaning to hurt someone. Even so, a few minutes later a message comes through: ]
It might be difficult, but you should talk to them. If you hide something that's hurting you, they'll be hurt anyway.
It sounds nice on paper, right? If we bottle it up, no one else has to get hurt. Just keep smiling, no one will notice!
But they do notice. Seeing someone you love being so close... But so far away, it hurts more than any truth.
text, un: Mariposa, private
How can she tell them that? How can she look them in the eyes and tell them how badly she's been hurt? And that that pain can actually, never go away? How can she say that to them?
But she wants to, so badly. Not to hurt them, but because of how much it weighs on her. The sadness, the despair, the hopeless... she wants to tell them because she needs help shouldering it. Luisa's the only one who understands, but she's struggling under her own burdens too. She can't take on Mirabel's as well.
It just hurts so much. That it happened. That she's left lost and confused in the aftermath of it all.]
I'm so scared of telling them. I don't want to hurt them. I don't want
them to be afraid of me.
text --> audio un: miyako, private
[ Her response is immediate — Typed too quickly and without pause sent. As soon as it's sent, however, she instantly regrets it. On her end, it's a slap to the head and a fierce mumbling at herself before she quickly switches gears.
Deciding that she needs to fix the message quicker than typing could do, she switches to audio: ]
Sorry, honesty is my best and worst quality. [ There's something in the way that she says it that lilts with self-deprecation, but it's not something she notices. Her attention focused on what she wants to say — Some part of her caring more in the first minute than she'd like to admit: ]
I did mean that, but not exactly like it... I mean — From the moment you're hurting, the people you care about are hurting as well. Hurting by yourself just hurts them double. It's scary to tell people. Boy, if I told my parents what I was doing when I was a kid I would have been stuck in the house forever.
... But even if you don't want them finding out, they will.
And I can promise, if they love you they won't be afraid of you. They'll be more afraid of you having faced it all alone.
Audio, un: Mariposa, private
I-I see...
I'll try...
[She's so scared, but she's right. After all, she doesn't think she can hide her possession forever, as much as she'd like to.]
I'll try to tell them.
Audio, un: miyako, private
I don't know what it is... But you're allowed to be scared, okay?
If you need to scream, cry, or talk that's all okay. It's worse to leave it all bottled up.
It's okay if you can't tell them today, too. If you need someone until then, well... I might be just a voice on the internet but I'll scream with you.
[ Maybe not the greatest way to phrase that she can listen and encourage anything, but well, she tried. ]
Audio, un: Mariposa, private
Is it okay... if I tell you now? What happened, I mean.
Audio, un: miyako private
Of course, you can. Do you want to stay like this? If you think it would help, we can always meet somewhere, too.
[ Both so if she's around the people she doesn't want finding out they don't... Accidentally find out. Or for something soothing to eat
She only knows how to fix things with food]Audio, un: Mariposa private
[If her family's Gifts don't work the way they should, Dolores shouldn't be able to hear this. Not enough to put it together, she hopes.]
If I get caught sneaking out of the house at this hour, then that's not really how I want to break the news to my family.
Audio, un: miyako private
[ There's a sheepish kind of laugh in her voice when she responded, but she's not going to say as to why. Most people would get in trouble for sneaking out of the house... She just did it constantly and never got caught or maybe they knew it was end-of-thew-world Digimon attacking.
Either way, she adds in a surprising amount of patience for her: ]
Whenever you're ready, I'm listening.
Audio, un: Mariposa private, cw: death mention
Okay, so I don't know if you were there when a lot of us got kidnapped to this fae realm? I was one of them. And it wasn't so bad - I couldn't go home, but it's not like I was treated badly or anything... mostly.
[Aside from the whole... fae cursed thing she got.]
Well, I didn't want to just sit around the whole time and wait to be rescued. So I followed the rescue group out to see if I could help - I couldn't, but... I found my sister fighting a dragon. I... accidentally distracted her, and she got hurt real bad. She tried protecting me the whole time, but she couldn't - she was too hurt. We got knocked into a wall by the dragon, and rocks started falling around us...
... and we couldn't escape. Our only choices were to be crushed to death, or buried alive. I begged for help, and it came... in the form of this wolf? Wolf spirit? It made a deal with me, and another spirit made a deal with my sister. They would save our lives... in exchanges for our bodies.
We... we had no choice. It was either take their help, no matter the cost, or die.
And we didn't want to die.
[Mirabel rubs her forehead.]
I'm sorry, this must sound crazy-
audio ; un: miyako ; private
Death isn't something she knows is lacking in adventures. She faced the prospect of being a reason something was killed when she was twelve, after all, but it doesn't make things easier. Doesn't make it any more easy to hear from a voice as young and scared sounding as the one on the other end of the phone —
Helping out with Chosen around the world as she did has prepared her for a lot of things, but at the same time she never feels adult enough to know how to answer. It's why the laugh in her voice falls flat as she tries to dismiss it: ]
Don't worry about it. I've been a part of enough crazy stuff I have to believe it!
[ The laugh's in her voice, but it was definitely flat — Not quite able to pull off her usual energy in a somber moment. It's a lot harder to be mature when the one who helps you be isn't around, but she tries: ]
... Thank you, for sharing with me. I know it's not easy.
[ There's a pregnant pause, an uncommon flumoxing with words before she adds evenly: ] I think — I'm not the right person to hear this from and I'll probably mess it up but...
Sometimes we have to do what we need to... to survive, you know? It's probably the most difficult decisions of our life sometimes and we have to do that part on our own... But it's important to know we're not alone, too.
I really mean it. If there are people who love you as much as you love them here, you shouldn't lock them out. That kind of stuff only makes it worse. Because right now what you need... It's someone to tell you it'll be all right and they still accept you, right?
audio ; un: Mariposa ; private
I… wanna hear the words “it’ll be all right” so much it hurts. Because it doesn’t feel like it’s going to be all right. My family is magical but we’ve never had to deal with anything like possession before! It’s all so strange and new… and terrifying.
You’re right though. I shouldn’t keep them out…
audio ; un: miyako ; private
That's just normal, right? When we're somewhere new or facing something new, it's always the worst. But if we stop believing in ourselves, the people we care about, and the future then things won't ever change. It might not be tomorrow and there are some things we can't fix, but if we try then there's always hope.
Mm! That's right— [ A half laugh, oversimplifying matters: ] Don't be like me and have them find out only after you chase a bad guy to another world.
audio ; un: Mariposa ; private
Thank you for hearing me out. I know that was some pretty heavy stuff, but... I think I will tell my family. At least mamá... I don't think I could hide it from her forever anyway.