Text | UN: makeitaventi

[venti_late]

WHO: Venti and all of y'all!
WHERE: Network
WHEN: Near the end of May
WHAT: There's a new grandpa in town, and he's marginally more well-adjusted than Zhongli! Marginally. This one at least knows how to manage his finances.
WARNINGS: This will be a little cursed most likely, and probably language!

So this is a weird, new app! Since I can't delete this thing, I'm gonna guess that it's not some weird community thing for Kaisou, right? Like a FB group for people to get strongarmed into--I mean join?

Guess it wouldn't hurt too much to intro myself since I'm new here. I'm Venti! I just moved here like. Today. Lovely place, the Spirit Vein up above really sets the mood!

Okay, so here's an icebreaker for you guys, just to have a little bit of fun!

Is cereal a soup? Alternatively, how do you say the word 'pecan?'

And a friendly reminder that bananas are berries, but strawberries aren't berries!

Comments

[venti_late]

Absolutely agreed! What fantastic people I've found here already.

Oh my god, you're so right. Honestly, I'm surprised he knows how to text and use a keyboard. I thought maybe he'd been stuck with a typewriter all this time. Anyway, who knows? Maybe we're bitter exes, maybe we're just friends, maybe we're just in an on-and-off again relationship. Oh, or friends with benefits!

[vENTI PLEASE....]

It's so true! I'm already judged a lot for my job, so I'm good keeping that down to a minimum when I'm off the clock. And yep! Magical healing music! When I sing or play an instrument, I can heal people up! Not major injuries, of course, but it's very handy to have.

[bebest]

You're BLESSED, Babe.

I wonder if he texts with one finger? Bet he does. And GASP, it's a mystery. You're just gonna leave me connect my own dots here, huh? Because I promise, I will connect them in the most SCANDALOUS way ever.

[And then he'll feed it down the Kaisou Gossip Tree. As is his duty as the Gossip Queen.]

Seriously? What is WRONG with people? It's not like you're stealing people's kidneys as a career path. People are WEIRD sometimes, seesh. Nice! You'll probably use that a lot here. This city is like, a disaster magnet.

[venti_late]

I'm already blessed by having met a distinguished individual such as yourself!

Oh, please, I implore you to connect them as scandalously as possible! It's entirely possible he and I are star-crossed lovers, after all.

[Truly, there's a reason Venti is Zhongli's personal migraine.]

OMG I KNOW, RIGHT? Let me live! I'm just having fun writing and playing music! But, man, I can already guess that based on the fact Zhongli's here. Wouldn't be the first time I've healed him with my music and it sure won't be the last.

But for the less magical part of it, I'll need to look into auditioning for any orchestras. I noticed that there's a theater here. However, I'm not 100% certain if they take those kinds of auditions.

[bebest]

You are ABSOLUTELY blessed to meet me because I am a BLESSING.

That's the narrative I'm going with. I think in the interest of fairness, I should tell you we went on a date, but I'm like 98% sure he didn't even realise that's what it was, so you're all good to go ravish him. I'm rooting for you!

[Eat shit, Zoodles :D]

I happen to own a theatre (the best one in town, humble brag, so probs the one you're thinking of) so if you're ever looking for a place to play, I gotchu! I'm for sure not opposed to magical music.

[venti_late]

Oh, no, that's entirely fair! He is quite the looker, and he looks the part of a distinguished gentleman. I'm fairly certain he didn't even realize that when he took me to a restaurant in Venice, it 100% had a date atmosphere to it.

[Rest in fucking pieces, dragon man.]

Oh, really? I'd love to take you up on that offer! I do have a question, though. My favorite instrument is the harp. How much do you allow me playing up the pose I have to take to play it?

[Because, honestly, it can be very flirty sometimes. Maybe not singing while languishing on a piano sexy, but it can come close!]

[bebest]

He really IS a looker, and he talks so fancy! And omg a restaurant in VENICE. Zhongli, honey, please. He cooked me dinner in my own kitchen. He gave me wine with a little ribbon on it. A little ribbon. But he's adorable and actually kinda nice company so I can forgive him for it. But Venice? With the gondolas and everything?

[Forgiveness doesn't mean he won't take the chance to rip the piss out of him when he gets the chance. He wore a really slutty shirt, Zoodles, and you didn't even notice :(]

Ooooooh a harp! Fancy AF!! And Babe, you can play it up as MUCH as you like. Have I given you the impression I'm proper at any point because if I have oh my god I am so sorry.

[venti_late]

Oh my goddd, he cooked in your own kitchen and didn't even spend the night? The actual disrespect. He's lucky you were gracious enough to forgive him. But yeah! Venice, Italy! The restaurant was absolutely lovely, and the wine was incredible. I almost took a tumble into the canal and he saved me like the gentleman he is.

[It's absolutely deserved, and Venti will only fuel the fire.]

Excellent! Then, I know to dial it up to 10 when I perform there with my harp and cello. It's hard to make a flute sexy, but I'll give that my best shot.

[bebest]

The ACTUAL disrespect!!! I wore one of my sluttiest shirts too and I don't think he even paid the tiniest bit of attention to it. All that effort, it's absolutely heartbreaking! Oh my goose he saved you from the canal and he STILL didn't pick up on the romantic tones? That's like, straight from a cheesy Hallmark movie. Sir, PLEASE.

[Venti is giving him so much joy right now.]

YAS, please dial it ALL the way up!!! I've got all the faith in you that you will SLAY.

[venti_late]

Hehe, well, it's just how Zhongli is, for better or for worse. Honestly, I'm just glad he's at least making friends. He's got that undeniable, "I'm lonely, but I don't know how to say it" aura, you know?

Ohhh, maybe I'll find a slinky black dress to really bring it home! It's been a long time since I've had an excuse to bust out a pair of heels. Not that I minded dressing up in a suit and tie for my other performances, but you know how strict they can be on dress code.

[bebest]

Oh TOTES. He just needs to have people insinuate themselves into his life and force him to accept our friendship. He might fight it a little, but he'll give up eventually.

They can be SO strict. Mine is: do whatever the hell you like. And I am SO jelly. It's a real pain getting heels that fit me now- I've got a whole bunch in my closet that just don't fit me anymore and don't work anymore anyway because I only have SINGLE pairs.

(I was a human and now I'm a centaur: context!)

[venti_late]

You're already speaking his language! And mine, at that. That's how I became friends with him, honestly!

Oh, no! That's really unfortunate! Oh, but, do you think there's a blacksmith who could maybe make heels for centaurs? Noooot that I know of any off the top of my head, granted.

[bebest]

That's how I make like 905 of my friends tbh. It never fails, so why fix what ain't broke, right?

[Or you can just make friends normally, you weirdos.]

It's okay, I figured out how to make it work for me! Plus I'm a zebrataur and you know stripes go with EVERYTHING, so that's amazing. I think we're in the wrong century for blacksmiths. Unless there's like...one in Undertown somewhere? But god I would kill for a nice pair of heels again.

[venti_late]

[Venti does make friends the normal way... buuuuuuut he's also a little shit.]

Exactly! If it works, it works!

Oh, you're so right that stripes go with everything. No other zebrataur could hold a candle to your majesty! I'm not sure if there's a smithy in Undertown, but they do exist as smalltime businesses for repairs, shoeing, and custom blade work elsewhere. I had to search pretty hard to find a good one to repair an antique knife I inherited.

[bebest]

[Zulius can't do anything the normal way. If anyone ever perceived him as "normal" he'd probably pitch a shitfit about it.]

THANK you for saying these completely true and accurate things about me! You know, I might give it a try. I don't want anything actually nailed into my hooves because that sounds like a BAD time. But hey, you don't ask, you don't know, right?

Ooooh a knife, fancy!

[venti_late]

Very true, and a prudent course of action! I'm sure that it'll be a fun challenge for any blacksmith.

[Fun for who? Okay, maybe a blacksmith will enjoy the challenge, but it's also Zulius. This sounds more like fun for Venti.]

Quite! It came from my dad's side of the family. He liked to claim it came from as far back as the 500s CE.

[bebest]

Babe, I like to think I'm a fun challenge for anyone.

[It can be fun for the both of them. But not the blacksmith. Fuck that guy. ]

Oh snap, so it's an OLD ass fancy dagger. You should show it to my friend, Vergil. He loves stuff like that. He'd probably get a kick out of it.

[venti_late]

Queen, just from this conversation, I 100% agree!

[May this anonymous blacksmith rest in fucking pieces.]

Hehe, that sounds like fun! I can at least let him look at it, if he's so passionate for history.

[bebest]

SUPER glad you're reading that loud and clear!

He is! At least weapons. He's got an antique store in the city and everything!

[venti_late]

Oh, I bet my friend and this Vergil character would get along extremely well! If they haven't met already, of course. Thank you for helping me feel so welcome in Kaisou. I look forward to a long and beautiful friendship with you!

[bebest]

There's aaaalllways a chance in a place like this. It's like six degrees of Kevin Bacon in this city, I swear. Likewise! It's gonna be a BLAST, I can tell.