Network: Un: PantsonPyre

[localweirdo]

WHO: Hu Tao
WHERE: Network
WHEN: 3/3/23
WHAT: Hu Tao trying to lighten up the mood
WARNINGS: Shenanigans

Greetings! I know that times have been rather challenging lately but I figured that we need something to brighten people's spirits up!

In response, I happen to have a notebook that gives people some rather funny answer to your problems. Please do enlighten me on what it might be and perhaps it might give you a response!

How about it? What do you have for me?

Comments

text | un: blackbirdtarot

[drewthetower]

what do I do to keep my family from sharing embarrassing stories of me?

text; un: jcarter_news

[phoenixwiz]

Is there a good alibi for me to use to the swim team as to why I might need to sit out for next year?

[nosferatanking]

How do i explain that an experiment gone awry took out someone’s door?

[localweirdo]

Let's see...

Make people think you have an expensive car phone by calling them, asking them to repeat everything they say and then hanging up half way through their reply.

[localweirdo]

According to this notebook, it says to go to the doctors to make something up but...

It also says to go a doctor whose office plants have died.

[localweirdo]

Blame it on someone else!

Locate the suspected individual by locating them in every single room in the house until a loud screams reveals the source this individual!

[drewthetower]

what the hell is a car phone?

[localweirdo]

I don't know but I sure would like one.

[drewthetower]

why? we have cellphones now

[phoenixwiz]

Huh, that sounds like a pretty simple plan. Maybe the doctor with dead plants might be having a clinic near my family’s house. I will try to contact them to come up with a reasonable one.

[localweirdo]

What kind of reason do you think they'll make?

[localweirdo]

The better question is why not?

[drewthetower]

because cellphones??

[phoenixwiz]

Let’s see. ‘It appears that Mr. Carter has been caught with a nasty flu of some kind and he needs a lot of rest very badly for the next several months.’ That is the best guess I can think of at the moment.

Text; UN: Filledwithsunshine

[onebadapple]

I have a heart-shaped ruby stuck in my chest that can't be removed.

[localweirdo]

Because car phone???

[localweirdo]

Use skin colored paint.

It would solve the problem of getting it removed.

[localweirdo]

Or you can make it even more dramatic! What about open heart surgery?

[onebadapple]

I... don't think it CAN be removed without killing me.

[drewthetower]

cellphones are just car phone you can take with you

[phoenixwiz]

Now this one is an even better idea. I never thought about it in the first place. Surgeries do need the patient to have the time to recover after they went through one. I will be thinking about it when consulting with the doctor.

[localweirdo]

Then glad I could be of service!

The problem now is to figure out how to get away with it. Any ideas?

[localweirdo]

Doesn't mean that we can't have an actual car to make multiple phone calls all at once!

[localweirdo]

All the more reason to keep it painted?

I'm impressed, the notebook actually gave some good advice for once!

[phoenixwiz]

Hm, there is trying to feign fainting spells and heavy breathing. Realistically, there is no way someone could swim in the water well while having breathing difficulty.