kaisou | Video | UN: makeitaventi

WHO: Venti and everyone on Gemini!
WHERE: Gemini App
WHEN: End of May
WHAT: Some old, familiar faces are back on the Gemini app!
WARNINGS: None~

[Has everyone had a good week? Hopefully so! Because it's about to either get a lot better or a lot worse, depending on who you are!

At first, it starts out as audio only with a strangely familiar voice coming in through the speakers. However, that familiar voice is currently putting on a pretty good Jonathan Frakes from Beyond Belief impression.]

Did you know that Cheetos are made of corn~?

[And then the video snaps on to reveal that it is, indeed, Venti. He's grinning and looking to be in good health.]

Hey, Kaisou! Long time no see, am I right? Zhong probably told a lot of you that I had some, um... issues, and I'm open to questions about it, but! Suffice it to say, I've been feeling a lot better and I saw that I still have access to Gemini, so~! Here I am! You might see some other familiar old faces, too, soon enough~.

[His grin grows softer, now, as he decides to be more sincere.]

I know you guys can always visit me at the Vogue and everything, but it's different when I'm not on the app, huh? Well, I wanted to thank everyone for worrying about me and I'm truly happy to say that I'm at least still here on Gemini, even if I'm not on the Libra network anymore. If you ever need my help, please don't hesitate to call. Though, I'd at least appreciate some wine or an apple as payment~!

[That last sentence is a tease, though. Everyone who knows Venti knows that he doesn't really need that.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Well! If it ain't my ex!

[This is the funniest bit, he's never letting it go.

And then for another bit, he adds:] I thought they were made from pure, real cheese. Y'know, like it says on the front.

You missed a few things, by the way. Has Zhongli caught you up on them just yet?

Haha, out of everyone I had a feeling you'd find your way back onto these apps.

Welcome back grandma! I'm glad you're feeling better.

[Venti's return to the network is nice, because now Zhongli doesn't have to play the messenger. That's far more suited to a bird.]

... Dare I ask what a 'Cheeto' is?

[Oh, oh, oh, Flins knows this one. He was going to welcome Venti back, but lizard and fae brains activate.]

I believe its a term for an adulterer.

Edited 2026-05-30 13:17 (UTC)

[Surely Flins has more of a handle on the Youth (tm) than Zhongli, right?

............................. maybe not.]

Is that so? [a pause, lizard brain working overtime] How curious. Are adulterers typically turned into corn on this continent?

[You'd think, with all the children and grandchildren, he'd learn. Perhaps the more you accumulate the less with the times you become.]

That is the conundrum. Sir Venti did state they 'are' made of corn. Perhaps at birth? Alternatively, is a metaphor for their dark turn. Or perhaps they are cursed, either by the fae or some other entity that has judged them.

[They're thoooooooonking]

Edited 2026-05-30 14:13 (UTC)

[He could clear up this mistake. He could point out that cheetos is a snack, not adulterers. But--]

Oh, I know. According to legends from the Mayan Pantheon, the gods created human from corn. Which, considering the Book of Genesis doesn't go into specifics how God created humans... I can't rule out the possibility corn was in fact used in our creation.

Edited 2026-05-30 18:29 (UTC)

[Zhongli trusts Jun's knowledge of other religions. He nods slowly, invisibly, and makes a noise of interest.]

I would have thought it was clay, but I admit I have a bias towards the earth.

[To put it mildly.]

So this 'Cheeto' phenomenon is less of a... curse of corn and more like returning to the source?

[If it helps, he is actually telling the truth on the myths.]

Haha, actually that was the material made on the first attempt, though the translations described it as "mud". However, it didn't work because mud-made humans couldn't speak, couldn't think, and worst of all - they would dissolve in water. Which, that's quite a problem when they're in a world whose surface is 70% covered in water.

The second attempt was with wood. The wooden humans could walk, talk, and even reproduce! But they had no soul and no memories. And without a soul or memories, they couldn't show gratitude and worship the gods. So the gods deemed them a failure and caused a great flood to wash away these humans. They say the survivors of this batch of humans later became monkeys.

The third attempt is when they used corn and the humans that exist today. So... yeah! I suppose you could call it returning to the source.

Clay would have been my first thought too--after all, it is the Earth that nourishes all life. It gives us food, it can provide shelter, and the ground we walk on. It's only natural that these ancient people used it first to craft the first humans.

[Nodnod.]

To think corn was the right ingredient...absolutely fascinating. They do say that the third time is the charm. They must've saw something in corn that both clay and wood did not have. Perhaps its life energy, being a fast growing staple food source, meant that it was more vibrant?

Either way, you are truly wise beyond your years, Jun. This has been most enlightening.

Adulterer or not, in the end... humans are all corn.

...So...kinda like the Cornservant?

[SCINTILLA NO DO NOT ENGAGE too late]

Is that runnin' 'round here, or that just a Tural thing?

The Cornservant...?

What's that?

Oh, s' this little walkin', talkin' ear of corn by looks. But they're a spirit, real fixated on givin' food t' those folk what'd otherwise go without. Nice little guy, kept payin' me in corn for my help.

Wow... incredible! Proof that sapient beings CAN be made from corn.

Aye, not the strangest thing. Maybe a little odd t' go about givin' people food that's also sort of you, but if it works n'all.

...Invented popcorn, too. Don't think Etheirys had that 'fore then, but I ain't well versed enough in everywhere to say for sure.

Maman? [ confusion and delight mixes like the waters of a whirlpool upon her face. while she made a point to visit them whenever she was able between her self appointed duties within Meropide and her work at the Vogue, Furina never thought she'd see Venti on the networks again. ] Oh! I am beyond overjoyed to see you out and about again!

[ no, those are not tears in the corner of Furina's eyes you're seeing things get your eyes checked. ]

Really, I'm so glad you're okay.

It's definitely different when you're not on the app. Welcome back!

Would Apfelkuchen using only the finest apples soaked in a white wine suffice?

I have no request, only my gratitude that you've returned to us.

Welcome back, Sir Venti.

SQUEAL! There he is! I know I've seen you like EVERY day regardless, but it's SO good to see you here again, Bestie! And just in time for pride, too! It's like the Pride Angels looking down on us. It's beautiful, honestly.

Now we can share tea on HERE, too!

Oh, shite, that's where my new phone went.

[what does that mean?????]

Cheers, mate, thanks for the noise makin' it easier t' find.

omg hi!!!! thats so cool ur back i know lots of people were bummed u were uh having issues so!! HI HOW R U

[.....]

You just can't resist coming back swinging with cursed bullshit, huh?

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