text; un: doordasher

[doublethumbsup]

WHO: Hermes
WHERE: Libra Network
WHEN: 2am - Dec 3rd
WHAT: Hermes can’t sleep. Thoughts ensue
WARNINGS:N/A


so

do u ever think about those Xmas movies where like
the adults are all
SANTA ISNT REAL KIDS LOL
but like he is??


where do they think all these presents keep coming from on Xmas morning???
do they just like
think their partner did it or ????
but then what if the kid got coal
how do they handle that??

“Jeremy how could u give Timmy coal!!! Ur just so cold to this family!!”
“Idk Tiffany maybe if u were home more often—“

…

dont watch Xmas romcoms ok they give u weird brain thoughts lol

Comments

text, un: jingnyan

[pranas]

What if their child got turned into coal?

[ Jing Yuan is not helping. ]

un: hextechnician

[hexcrafter]

[what's sleep]

I have found this a baffling contradiction, honestly. Particularly coming from the perspective of the whole mythology being foreign to me, it seems a strange oversight.

un: Shroud | Text

[whiteshroud]

[Hey hermes its your favorite person]

Do you want a real answer or a funny answer?

text | un: silhouetto

[threebetrayals]

Let's be real, no one in those movies communicates. That would be healthy and normal.

text: un:kore

[aslowburn]

...No.

I'm not handling this one. This is on one of you people. I'm going back to bed.

text; un: absolutenumber

[mediocrites]

This inconsistency has always bothered me, even as a child. Surely not all parents can be so inattentive as to not be certain where every gift came from. There ought to be theories, investigations. You could build a conceptual framework around it and have a basis for a new and unique setting.

Text | UN: lunae

[heng_like_a_dragon]

Shouldn't you be asleep?

[He's going to bed in an hour just to wake up at the normal time of 6am, Jing Yuan.]

[pranas]

[ !! shit, he's been caught. ]

It's difficult to sleep without you at my side, A-Heng.

[ perfect excuse. nailed it. ]

Text | UN: HelplesslyWeak

[life_ethereal]

I think Professor Ratio has already said what I wanted to say: make it a holiday mystery! Give us Christmas mysteries, like how the parents never noticed the presents just showing up!

[heng_like_a_dragon]

If that was the case, you'd be right next to me trying to be cute and pitiful enough to coax me to bed.

[Get called out, dummy.]

[pranas]

[ noooo, don't call him out. not in front of everyone! ]

Come to bed, then.

text; un: lycaon

[paraselenic]

An ouroboros of logic, as the parents were once children, and would have known Santa existed, but then grew up 'losing' that believe, only to let their children believe in turn.

Could it be that perhaps they simply stop giving their own gifts, and take credit for Santa's? I've never given it a considerable amount of thought, since I have always known.

[Something about being a wolfman your whole life makes 'jolly man who delivers toys' all the more believable.]

Please go to sleep.

Private!

[heng_like_a_dragon]

[You know what, he's going to make this private. Not because he might get a little flirty, but it's because Dan Heng's uncertain if there's an underlying reason Jing Yuan doesn't want to get into right now.]

Come over here and make me. I'm in the office.

Text; un: lightkeeper

[lanternae]

Tell me. How does one acquire coal? Can you request it specifically? I'm not all that interested in causing trouble for others to receive some.

voice; BirdspottingFan1

[clonizo]

[Sorry Hermes, but voice is faster than this boy trying to type]

.... wait, why are people upset about getting coal?? It's way more useful than socks.

text | un: sinnoh

[blessed_bonds]

Hm... Good question. I know in some movies they have the explanation that people are forced to forget Santa is real when they grow up, so maybe the same Christmas magic makes it so they don't question the mystery presents?

text | UN: bruhmoments

[guardianreaper]

nah

i always figured they were glad for free shit

like, i wake up and there’s a twelve-pack there i didn’t buy? hell yeah free beer

[doublethumbsup]

YTHAT CAN HAPPEN???//

[doublethumbsup]

[Sorry, Victor, they're reading that... a couple times.]

i mean its weird to ME and i like
grew up with it
like i get if u know santas real ur not gonna question a bunch of extra presents
but if u dont????

howwwwwww do u explain it?

[doublethumbsup]

[dsfhdkjsf YOU.]

oh uh
hey Pope Man

both???

[doublethumbsup]

yeah well
i kinda dont think real couples do a lot of that either
from like

what ive seen lol

[doublethumbsup]

why ARE u awake...?

[doublethumbsup]

[WiiMusic10hours.mp3]




so
a mystery movie? but with santa?

[doublethumbsup]

[Oh thank god, a translation--]

YEAH
i bet they blamed each other tho
and were like HAROLD WHY DID U GET MYCKENZEE A DOLL ITS PINK OUR HOUSE IS BEIGE
and hes like CAROL WHY DID U NAME OUR KID THAT ALSO I DIDNT GET HER THE DOLL U DID
and then she runs away with an amish baker or something idk

[doublethumbsup]

a what

ok yeah but like - they still get a bunch of magic appearing xmas stuff and they never even go "what"
like
not even at each other???

nah im good ill sleep later