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kaisou2025-05-13 11:29 am
May Event Log
May Spirit Realm Event Log
Dominant Element: Shadow
Waning Element: Light
Full Moon: May 11th - 13th
※
While the weather has been typical of a pleasant late spring, there's no missing how dark the nighttime hours are. Not only is the Spirit Vein darker with hues of black and purple, but even the city lights don't seem to light up as well as they normally do. It's so easy to feel like you're constantly enveloped in a looming darkness. It's made even worse by the increase of spirits in the city, that whisper and haunt several spots around Kaisou.
Haunted NightsKaisou is no stranger to hauntings - a city with an active spirit vein will always see more paranormal events than one without. This month however? There is a significant increase of ghostly activity. Where once you might caught the odd poltergeist knocking things over in a store, or see a floating orb passing you in the night, now the city is lousy with ghosts. Some are your standard Kaisou ghost fare - souls who have not yet passed on who are haunting the living world until they can - but others are not that. If you are born of this world, or especially if you're an otherworlder, you will start to notice ghosts of people you recognize. Even of people who, last you remember or saw them, were absolutely not dead.
Some of these ghosts may be a comfort to you- a chance to reconnect with someone you loved long ago. And some are just that- happy to talk to you- to ask you to help them move on from this world, acutely aware they are not supposed to be here. These ones are easy to deal with, they don't want to be hanging around, they just want to move on and find their peace. Some, however, are angry and are aiming to cause as much destruction as they can. They want to harm the living and will outright attack anyone who comes near them- some even seek out property to damage. If they knew you in life, they might lash out - calling you out on your wrongdoings in life, anything that might have cause them harm - perceived or otherwise. These ghosts will not pass on easily, and will need to be exorcised.
Some paranormal residents of the city will suddenly take up ghost blogging as a hobby, running around with cameras trying to interview and sometimes outright provoke the ghosts into action, hindering your efforts to keep the peace. Regardless of how you ultimately deal with the ghosts, it's clear that their numbers are not going to slow. That by helping (or forcing) them to move on, all you're really doing is putting a band aid on a bullet wound. You need to cut the invasion off at the source, to prevent the flood of ghosts from continuing into the city. Luckily, Zodiac have an answer on how to do just that.
Land of the ForgottenOn the morning of May 5th, your phone will receive a notification from the Zodiac on the Libra app.
ALERT: SPIRIT REALM GATE DETECTED IN CATHEDRAL HILL
Element Classification: Shadow
Danger Level: Extreme
Designation: Land of the Forgotten
Zodiac has detected a Spirit Gate on Cathedral Hills. Reports indicate it's the Land of the Forgotten, and may be related to the increased paranormal activity in the city.
When you had into the Zodiac office, you will find the place to be rather quiet. Apparently a lot of the staff have been in a lot of meetings since a recent PR fumble by one of the staff. Professor Barbie is rather unaffected by this, however, and she's much more interested in discussing the matters of the Spirit Realm. You see, Zodiac's also noticed the increase in spirits. It turns out, these ghosts have been escaping out of a tear of one of the afterlife realms- the Land of the Forgotten, specifically.
Those who have been on the app for a long time might be getting flashbacks to that realm, as it's the place where several app users died during a ritual sacrificial game of soccer during the first year of the app. Not to mention it's covered in ruins of the past worlds... all in all, not a pleasant realm to visit. But Professor Barbie insists that the tear needs to be investigated, and since you guys are the experts in dealing with such issues... it's up to you. Professor Barbie's even gone far enough to get clearance from the Black Order to allow you access to the realm... so you might not have much of a choice.
The gate is found in Cathedral Hill, in an old nearly-forgotten cemetery behind the church. It appears as a majestic mausoleum of sorts, with a foreboding dark energy radiating from it. Sure enough, at any given time, there are a couple Black Order Guardians posted nearby it, monitoring and making sure no one tries to go into this realm that shouldn't be there. However, once they realize you're an app user, they'll PROBABLY let you through. Some of the more thoughtful ones will give you word of caution- this will be far from an easy journey.
Ruins of OldAs you enter the realm, the sight that lays before you is a grim one. A land of ruins, covered in ash. This is the Land of the Forgotten, where those who are no longer remembered will eventually find themselves. The landscape is littered with ruins that have been forgotten by time: pyramids, towers, and castles, slowly eroding away and turning into ash themselves. As anyone born of this world wander these ruins, they will notice some buildings look familiar to them. Places from AU character's memories can be found scattered among the ruins of the realm: the schools they attended, their old houses, the place they once worked, and so on. These places can be explored in full, though they are in a worse state than they were in the memories. Still they look in better shape than some of the other buildings, almost like remembering them slows their descent into ash.
As you explore these ruins, you may want to be careful as you aren't the only ones in this realm. Numerous denizens live in this realm, serving as both the guards and the threats of the realm. There's the Tlahuelpuchi, female vampires that can shift between human and vultures or an monstrous form in-between. These vampires are out to drink people's blood, but can be fought off using metal. Any bodies of water (forgotten streams and lakes that are among the ruins) have Ahuizotl lurking within, a dog-sized creature with a hand on its tail that'll grab anyone who gets near with the intent to drown and feast on their flesh. And through some ruins prowls Dzulum, large jaguar creatures who are territorial and have claimed certain ruins as theirs. Any of these beings can't be reasoned with, and will attack on sight when they spot you outsiders to their realm.
However even with these monsters, the most numerous beings are the souls of the forgotten. They have a skeletal look to them, and can be found throughout the realm. Unlike the souls who still held enough memory and will to slip through the tear and into the city, these forgotten souls have grown too weak from the erosion process to cross the veil. A few of them might recognize you and call to you, but it's a person you've long forgotten either in your current or past life. Try to jog your memory as much as you can, but their name and face always slips out of your grasp. Most of the souls have resigned themselves to begin forgotten and eventually fading to ash, some even embracing it and making the best of it. However, some have not accepted their fate and have grown so resentful they've lost themselves in another way. Their skeletal forms are more monstrous and they will attempt to attack the living. Try to avoid or fight them off as best you can. Once defeated, they will crumble into ash.
Ruins of NewFor those here intent on sealing the tear, they'll quickly come to realize that this realm is far too massive and dangerous to explore blindly. So, your best bet is to track down the ruler of this realm, Xibalba, and have him tell you where there tear is. However, those with presence sensing or enough charisma to ask the various souls will come to learn that Xibalba isn't in his castle today. Rather, he's on the edge of the realm attending to some duties... and he's not alone.
So after a long trek, you'll reach the edge of the main area of realm, which cuts off as a jagged cliff. However... you'll notice beyond the mainland there are several floating islands that are being connected to the mainland by means of large chain bridges, and they're being slowly dragged to the main land. Each of these floating islands contain ruins of various locations, but ones that are much more intact than anything remaining on the mainland. Instead of singular buildings, there's entire neighborhood's worth of places, or maybe even small towns. And for some unfortunate otherworlders... some of these locations may be places they recognize from home. In front of next each chain bridge connecting an island is a tombstone. Chiseled onto the tombstone is the world's name that it came from, a long string of numbers indicating which version of that world it is, and the cause of its destruction.
Should you cross the chain bridge and reach the islands, you'll find it is in fact fresh ruins from other destroyed world. The newest of these islands still have souls lingering, waiting to be processed and move onto their next life. Some of them will remember their deaths, while others it came too fast for them to recall much at all. You can chat with them awhile, for the otherworlders it may feel as a tearful reunion. Some of these familiar worlds are clearly alternate universes from your own homeworld.... while others, it's too difficult to be sure which version it is.
Whether you wait with the souls, or go to find them on your own, eventually you will come upon the death god Xilbalba. He's not alone today, as this time he's accompanied by his wife and fellow death god -- La Muerte, who is a tall and beautiful skeleton woman. Fortunately thanks to the presence of his charming wife, Xibalba is much more personable today than the last time app users encountered him. If asked what they are doing, they will explain these islands came from recently destroyed worlds and whose remaining fragments were drawn to this world, so they were doing their duty of processing the souls and sending them to their next destination. For some of the souls, they'll be joining this world's reincarnation cycle, and for others... they'll be heading to their own respective afterlives, wherever that might be.
And so, upon seeing the two death gods, the souls will begin to line up to be processed. Xibalba will try to shoo you away so they can do their work, pointing in the direction of the tear so you can deal with it and get out of their hair. Meanwhile, La Muerte is empathetic enough that she'll encourage any otherworlders to say their goodbyes to any loved ones -- though she'll gently refuse allowing anyone to actually watch the soul processing, as some things about death truly cannot be known by the living. So... this is your time to say your goodbyes, and make your departure with the hope that one day, either in this life or the next life, you'll see your loved ones again.
As for anyone who tries to disrupt or stop the soul processing? Will get one singular warning from the gods not to intervene. However should you ignore these warnings and persist.... depending on how they go about it and how aggressive they are, the character will find themselves immediately being teleported out of the realm and unable to re-entered.... or just killed on the spot. Turns out you shouldn't mess with death gods.
[OOC: Please note that it's optional for OU homeworlds to be part of the newly destroyed worlds, and requires the approval of the whole cast (aka, please talk to your castmates!)! It's also up to players if these destroyed worlds are the ones the OUS came from or are just alternate universe versions! Also, should your character insist on fighting the death gods, you will need to fill out the death permission form, as that's basically the only result of that.]
Remain ForgottenOf course, you're not just here to deal with these destroyed worlds. You originally came to this realm to deal with the ghost problem, and that is still a prevalent issue. Xilbalba and La Muerte both say it's unusual that so many spirits would make a break for the land of the living. They normally would only do this on Día de los Muertos - respectful of the rules between the living and the dead. The fact they're doing it now suggests someone else is influencing them.
It doesn't take long to find exactly who that "someone else" is. Perhaps you noticed him among the fortune tellers in the park earlier in the month, perhaps you're seeing him for the first time, but the man who is causing this cuts an intimidating figure. He is very much alive, and not supposed to be here. The ghosts are congregating around him, swirling around him before sweeping off towards the tear. When you approach him, he acts as if he was expecting you. With a voice as smooth as honey, he introduces himself as Doctor Facilier - and that he has a proposition for you. He'll tell you that he's taking advantage of the tear and using the ghosts of the departed to help him cover some "delicate business up top, you know how it is, old debts, tricky magical complications that need a little extra push to complete". Exactly what any of that is, he doesn't say, but he remains slippery as an eel, making everything he's doing sound extremely reasonable. All he needs is for you to just turn the other way and let him get about his business - easy as pie, right? Just walk away!
If you choose to not walk away... well, Facilier turns out to be a formidable opponent. With a puff of some purple dust from his pocket, he can conjure a very convincing illusion around you. It will be something you want, something in your deepest darkest hearts desire. Perhaps you a wanted someone to tell you they loved you. Perhaps you have a dream job. Maybe you lost something extremely dear to you in your past, and now it's here, in front of you. Whatever it is, the illusion feels so very real. Facilier will use you being distracted by the illusion to go onto the attack. He might turn you into an animal. He might turn the ghosts swirling around against you. He might feed your illusion into someone else's, getting you to attack one another. And, if all else fails, he'll just try to bludgeon you with his cane.
Luckily, if you're able to fight through these illusions and all of Facilier's magic, it's clear he's not one for sticking around to fight a battle he can't win. As soon as he realises this is not a fight he can come on top of, he'll give you a tip of his hat and vanish in a puff of smoke like he was never there. The real issue gone, you will now need to help the death gods close up the tear (being sure to shepherd any remaining spirits back to where they belong) to make sure the problem never happens again. There's no sign of Facilier after the battle- but that doesn't mean he's gone for good.
[OOC: Facilier is an interactable NPC if you wish to thread out his confrontation! If you wish to thread with him, it can be done here!]
With the tear sealed, the influx of deceased spirits will come to an end in Kaisou. The only ones left are the ones that managed to leave while the tear was open. It's up to you folks to help those remaining souls move on, either by fulfilling whatever last wishes they have or simply telling them it's time go. The Land of the Forgotten will remain accessible until the end of the month, so people will get their chances to view stuff from their past lives if they wish. But at the end of May, it'll be time to say goodbye to the past, and keep moving on.
The dominant element this month is Shadow! Anyone with an affinity to the shadow element will find themselves boosted throughout the month. This could mean a boost to their power, having more energy, feeling more inspired with creativity, having better luck on different attempts -- the boost can manifest in all sorts of different ways. By contrast, anyone with an affinity for Light will be experiencing the opposite. Perhaps their powers will be weaker, they have less energy, they're having a creative block or general worse luck - again it can manifest in all sorts of way and players are free to play with this mechanic as they'd like.
The original OOC plotting post for this event can be found here.
no subject
I know.... you're a good man, Varian. Maybe you did things in your past... but you I know now, is a good man. [Perhaps one of the best people he knows, if he was honest. He gives a nod] And I'll tell you that as many times as you need to hear... like I'm sure you'd do for me.
[He pauses. He knows this isn't a place that the living should linger in, but he also knows Varian might need time to process]
Is there anything else you want to check? Before we go?
no subject
Hearing Jun call him a good man sweeps into that dread, shining a light in the darkest recesses of it and banishing those dark thoughts away. ]
Thank you. I might not always believe it if I tell it to myself, but I'll always believe you when you tell me. [Because if nothing else, his trust in Jun is absolute.] And of course- I'd do it whenever you need to hear it. Probably when you think you don't too.
[Because that's just how it was. They both had their particular demons that nipped at their heels they cannot fight alone. But they can fight each others just fine. At the question, he grimaces softly. ]
You know, a part of me always wanted to show you where I came from. But not- but not like this. [Not this ruined husk, destroyed by one man and his obsession with undoing something that happened centuries ago. ] I... think it's better I go. I already saw the ghosts of the people that matter to me.
[Except for Quirin. Though in this timeline, he'd be stuck in the amber still. Never released. That... is a deeply unsettling thought, and Varian banishes it with a solid exhale. No. Don't think about it. He stands up, looking around them. ]
Ugh. I always hated this dungeon.
no subject
Instead, using Varian's hand holding onto him, he'll slowly pull the pair of them up from the ground. ]
I'm sure we'll find some other opportunity for you to show me, under better conditions. [Because yeah, he knows this isn't the time for sightseeing. This was a graveyard, of sorts. He pauses, turning on his sensing ability. No signs of the death gods yet] For now, let's leave our place and collect ourselves.
[Were it just himself, he'd be insistent on pressing on with their mission to find the death gods- a mission needed to be completed after all. But he knows Varian might need to take things slower, especially after receiving this punch in the gut like this.
And at the mention of the dungeon, Jun will pause to look around. Even discounting the fact that this place is in ruins... he can tell this is truly a miserable hole, meant to leave people and forget about them. Did the king of Corona really lock people, including a young teen like Varian, in this hellhole?
...]
... It's a far cry from the Fortress of Meropide. Perhaps if this King sought to give prisoners better treatment, he wouldn't be ruling over rubble.
no subject
Hey, I meant it. And I'll tell you that as many times as you need. Because I'll always believe it, even if you don't. [He can't really give his partner a kiss while he has the Shroud getup on, so instead, he'll lean to press their foreheads together, just for a moment. ] I love you.
[But moving IS a good idea. He doesn't want to linger here. It's too much of a reminder of what he's lost. He can only be glad that it's not his own Corona that's here. That maybe... maybe his own is still safe. And perhaps, one day, the man he loves will get to see it. Properly. ]
I'd... I'd really like that, one day.
[He glances around them, brow furrowing. He spent a year in this dank, miserable place. Freezing cold, with the barest slivers of sunlight, living on cold gruel with only a pillow on a stone bed to spend his nights. He'd hated it here. He'd hated every living second, as the full weight of what he had done sunk in and how his despair had made him a perfect target for Andrew's lies. ]
Yeah, well. This isn't even the worst of it. If he really had enough of you, he sent you across the sea on a prison barge to work in the copper mines of Pincosta until you uh... died.
no subject
Alright, thank you. Maybe I don't believe it, but I trust that you mean it.
[Which is the honest trust. He believes in Varian and he trusts him, but actually accepting the notion that he's a good person.... that's a harder cross to bare.
.... Especially as Varian explains what King Fred does with prisoners. His hand that's not being held clenches into a fist, regretting that the king that's here is already dead and thus escapes any punishment mortals could dowel out to him
However.]
... You should tell that to Xilbalba when we find him. This king sounds like he's earned the eternal company of the Morning Star.
[That's right he's going to petition King Fred to be sent to Hell]
no subject
That's okay. It's had to believe that for yourself, I understand that only too well. But I do mean it, and I'm just gonna believe it for you, instead.
[And he will keep on doing so until he meets his end, if he needs to. It's not something he considers a burden at all.
He watches as Jun's other hand tenses - wincing a little at his partner's words. Once upon a time, he would have relished this. He would have signed it in triplicate, to make extra sure the King got his dues. But Varian knows where revenge leads him- where revenge against this particular king has led him. It brought him to this dank dungeon. It brought him to a point where he helped terrorists in a naive attempt to undo the damage he'd caused. It had destroyed his life in big and small ways, and left a shadow on his heart he doesn't think he can ever get rid of. His expression drops. ]
I couldn't do that to Rapunzel. I- I took her father away from her once in life. [ Wiped his memories, left him a shell of what he was. ] I hate that man, he's... he's a bad person and a worse king. But Rapunzel loves him, and... I don't want to be the person that hurts her by hurting him again. I can't do that, however much he deserves it. It's bad enough she had to die in this world so young... before... before she even got to connect with him again. I won't rob her of that in death.
[He frowns softly looking down at the rubble at their feet. ]
If he's judged how he's judged - then that'll be how it goes, and he'll meet whatever end he deserves. But... but I can't be the one that tips that scale. Or-or think I have the right to dole our that punishment because how I've... how so many people got hurt by him. [ He chews his bottom lip, worried. ] I don't wanna be that person again. I'm sorry.
no subject
And... that's what made Varian a better person than Jun. Because Jun wasn't willing to put aside that pain. Jun sees the condition of these dungeon cells, think of what these copper mines must've been like for all the poor souls sent there.... and all he feels is a deep anger at the mere idea of the king will getting away unpunished for heinous crimes.
He'll pull down his hood, so he can talk to Varian with his actual voice]
... Varian. I know you care a lot about Rapunzel.... but please, take a look around us. At the conditions the King left people in as his form of punishment. How do you think Wriothesley would feel about these cells? Do you think he'd ever let prisoners live like this?
And think of the people the King sent to the Copper mines.... how many of them were torn away from their families, never to see them again. Did they truly deserve that fate? And do you think the King ever once regretted his actions?
Speaking up with the truth isn't revenge, it's justice. It's making sure the final judge has the information they need to administer a fair judgement. And even if it'd upset Rapunzel... if she's as good and caring of a person as you say, she'd understand that.
[And if she'd truly hold it against Varian, for speaking up about this, then well... she's welcome to join her father in hell, as far as Jun's concerned. But he won't voice that part
He breaths out a little]
... But if you truly don't want to be the one to say anything... you don't have to. But I will.
[ Do what must be done, as was his pact ]
no subject
Jun takes the hood off and Varian stills- because he knows this makes it serious. So he pays attention as Jun speaks. With every question, his heart sinks a little more. He knows his partner's speaking the truth, he absolutely knows it. He nudges some of the rubble at their feet. ]
I imagine the Duke would hate every part of this.
[Wriothesley has made his feelings on the justice system very clear. How he feels this shouldn't be a punishment, but a means to grow. To redeem yourself form your past mistakes. Corona's prisons were never about that. Very few ever got to see the outside of their cells unless they broke out. There was no real justice in Corona. Just retribution. Zero tolerance no matter the crime. Varian knows his own crime had been extremely serious, but he has seen people locked away with no sign of freedom for simply stealing. Hell, Attila was facing the prison barge for vandalism he wasn't even guilty of. He would have ended up in the copper mines, guilty for the crime of being a poor citizen with a bad record. He lets out a slow breath.]
Someone I knew almost got sent to those mines when he'd done nothing wrong. And... and even the ones who did. No one deserves being worked to death. Corona law is corrupt... the- the king is corrupt. I know that... I-I do. And no, I don't think he regretted it. Like I told you before, the only reason I wasn't executed is because Rapunzel asked for leniency.
[ And that leniency was to be thrown in this dank, horrible dungeon for the rest of his life. Andrew made his life considerably worse, gave him plenty of new traumas, took away what little ability he had to trust other people left. But if he hadn't have broken Varian out, would he have ever had a chance to live outside these dungeons walls again? He seriously doubts it. And Fred would have been fine with that. ]
You're right. It's not revenge. And Rapunzel... she did know how unreasonable her father could be. [And yet she'd drop everything to save him. But Varian couldn't really judge her on that, after all he did for Quirin.] I tried so hard to make him see what he'd done to his people. How much he'd made them suffer. But I don't... I don't think he ever actually cared.
[ A par to him wants to hide behind Jun here. To let him speak out against the king and all that happened. But as much as telling the death gods about this feels like a betrayal to Rapunzel, keeping quiet about it feels like a betrayal to himself. To the countless people he's seen suffer through Corona's corrupt legal system through the years. No. He won't take the coward's way out here and leave that for Jun.]
Okay. I'll... I'll tell them. But [ he fidgets uncomfortably, guilt and fear gnawing at his insides] can you come with me? I can do it but I don't... I don't wanna be alone.
1/2
Varian rarely defended himself, always finding a way to blame himself about the situation while downplaying the acts of others. For a guy who could be so vocal when he was annoyed by silly things.... when it came to injustices, he had a way of making himself so small. As if he didn't deserve a seat at the table and was scared if he made waves, people would notice and throw him out. He remembered how fretful he was over how Jun's siblings would react to his past, as if any of their disapproval would give Jun reason to leave him.
Jun wonders if it was because of this king that Varian was like that. It had to be stressful, being allowed out of the prison... but know that one misstep against the King could throw him right back in. Or cost him his life, if the King stopped listening to Rapunzel.
And just hearing that this king never showed regret, and never seemed to actually cared... it snuffed out any conflict that Jun might've held in his heart. The Lord was the God of Salvation, so of course He advocated for forgiveness and mercy. But that was for those who sought forgiveness and to repent. And if this king refused to change his ways, even with Rapunzel and Varian doing their best to make him see what he was doing, well...]
I see. If he doesn't care or regret... then there is no saving him, no matter how much Rapunzel loves him.
[Then the only "Salvation" to be had here was to make sure this monster could never do this again to anyone else. ]
2/2
But knowing Varian was insisting on doing it himself... he knows how tough that must be. ]
Var...
[Nngh, he can see that guilt and fear. He'll step closer, pulling his fiancee into a tight and comforting hug. ]
Of course. I'll be there with you every step of the way. And you're sure? if you change your mind, I can step in.
no subject
Even then, his nightmares plagued him from the very real reactions from the townspeople to his redemption. Most of them (rightly, in Varian's opinion) didn't trust him, and met him with a frosty reception at best or outright hostility at worse. It got a bit easier after he helped battle back the red rocks- after Rapunzel made it clear that he was the sole reason the kingdom had been saved by them. But he never let his guard down. After all, people had made it clear what a monster they thought he was, and comments like that don't get scrubbed away so easily. It left him with a genuine fear that if people here found out... well, eventually someone would turn on him like this. It hadn't happened yet, but he's always expecting it. Waiting for it. His self-loathing making him feel it was a surety.
He feels a lump in his throat, that he swallows down. He doesn't want to cry here. He's wasted enough of his tears in this dank hole. ]
No... no I guess there isn't. He treated her badly too. Never- never on purpose, I don't think. But after losing her once... I guess he decided gripping her too tightly was better than risking her getting lost again.
[While missing that perhaps keeping the woman who had been held captive for eighteen years of her life in a stranglehold was a bad idea.
He welcomes Jun's hug wrapping his arms tightly around his fiancee, pressing his face into the fabric of his outfit around the neck, breathing in his scent and letting it ground him. It's so tough, and he's honestly terrified. ]
Thank you. And please. I'll- I'll try my best, but I don't know... [if he can see it all the way through ] I might need help.
no subject
But right now, as he holds and supports the man he loves, as he stares at this deplorable jail cell that was of the king's creation... he found himself not giving a single damn about the King's thoughts and feelings, or what pains he went through. He simply didn't. Regardless of what the King's relationship had been with his daughter, his answer to this situation would be the same. Where Varian had endless empathy, Jun had a streak of cold ruthlessness that always stubbornly remained- and that coldness was now on full force towards that heartless king. Were he to say anything more about him... that'd be made real clear. And he didn't want that affecting Varian.
So... he'll focus on the relationship he did feel warmth towards, which was the one he was holding. He'll wrap his arms tightly around the other, rubbing his back with his gloved hand. The uniform is padded and a little stiff, as it's meant for combat, but the divine magic imbued in it's threads brings a constant gentle warmth to it. ]
It's okay, I know this is difficult. [He'll reassure him gently] If you falter, I'll be there. Even if you can't get a single syllable out, I won't think any less of you. [He knows how difficult speaking out about such things can be. How many years had he remained silent about Krusnik? How he still struggles to speak on the Orden's acts, even to his nearest and dearest?]
And once it's over... we'll leave this place and go home. Our home. [Not Corona, but the one they're building together in the fortress. One where Varian has people who love him, unconditionally] Someone else can handle the rest of the mission. [As much as Jun liked to complete missions, Varian's well being mattered more.] Everything will be okay.
no subject
Because if he can't find some good in those people. If he can't find the sliver of a possibility of a redemption in them... then what does that mean for him? What makes him worth it above them? Does it mean he's truly worth it, or did he just luck out by being friends with the princess? He pushes that thought back in his mind. No. Those thoughts lie. He knows that. He shouldn't listen to them.
Which is to say... he really does rely on that coldness sometimes. He struggles to reach it in himself, but such a trait is protective. It saves Varian from himself. It stops him from dropping his own worth, from reaching down to help those who don't deserve it to the point of self-destruction. Because sometimes, you really do need to do what needs to be done. Jun has made him stronger for that- to give him the push when he really does need it. He sometimes feels guilty, for relying on it when he finds it so hard to find it in himself. But he knows Jun doesn't resent him for that.
He welcomes the warmth of the uniform, stiff though it is, because the person wearing it means the goddamn universe to him. He sucks in another breath, steadying himself. ]
Thank you. I- I couldn't do this without you.
[He couldn't find the courage to speak up at all. Couldn't find it in himself to really admit what an absolute mess Fred made of everything. He's still frightened, truth be told. He doubts he'll be able to get through this - but he knows Jun is there, standing beside him as always- stepping in when he can't move forward himself. For that, he is endlessly grateful.
His heart warms at the the thought of going home. Their home. Corona stopped being home to him a long time ago. It's the place he came from, and he will always love and deeply miss the people he's left behind. He'll miss the farm he grew up on and the smell of the tide around the island. These are part of the building blocks of his life- an intrinsic part of who he is. But it's not home. Not anymore. ]
I'd really like that. To-to go home. [ Oh but he knows how much doing his work mattered to Jun. He knows he doesn't like leaving them unfinished. He understand this is not a small thing his fiancee is offering here. ] Are... are you sure? I know your missions are really important to you.
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Instead, he'll respond to the question. It's an easy answer, one he doesn't have to think about. He gives a small but loving smile, before he moves his head to softly kiss Varian on the forehead.]
I'm sure. You're more precious to me than the mission.
[Which may be a given for most people, that their partner mattered more than a job. But considering Jun spent a whole life time being trained to only care about completing his mission? Being able to put it aside to help someone close to him was the highest form of love he can express. ]
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[He lets that oh linger for a moment. Quiet and soft. He knows only too well how Jun's mind works- how deeply he's been conditioned to finish a mission no matter what. It's not lost on him that leaving this one unfinished is aa big as deal as one can get. He sniffles a little, pressing a return kiss on his partner's cheek.]
That means so much to me. [More than words can express. He won't thank Jun again- he knows too many thanks make him feel awkward, so instead: ] You're precious to me too.
[ He takes a deep breath. ]
Okay. I'm ready to do this. Let's... let's get it done and then go home.
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Ah... well, you're worth it. Though I hope you don't mind if I start doing a lot of chores once we get home...
[He's got to satisfy the mission brain somehow. It's a brief little smile he'll give him, before he gets back to focusing at what needs to be done.]
Alright. Is there a place we can wait until the gods arrive? A place that isn't... here?
[Look he's not sure how long it'll take for the gods to get here, but he knows Varian probably doesn't want to hang in this jailcell the whole time they wait]
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[ He knows that Jun needs that. That it doesn't mean he's being abandoned or anything, that Jun needs to find some way to tie a bow around the mission to call it done- even if he has to shift the parameters of said mission onto something else.
At the question, he gives a thoughtful noise. He really doesn't want to stay down here. He spent a year of his life in this place, and he'd rather not spend any more of it here. Most of the city is rubble, and most of the townspeople hate him- this is not a timeline where he managed to make good on anything. Safe places to wait will be low on the ground... except. ]
...There is one place we should be okay. Come with me. [He takes Jun's hand again, leading him up and out of the dungeon- heading down the hill from the ruined castle. Ghosts cast Varian angry looks as he walks past them, he hunches his shoulders, keeping his eyes down, trying to ignore them. Eventually, they come to an open-fronted building, largely undamaged by the explosions that toppled this version of Corona. ]
Here. This... this is about as safe as it'll probably get.
[Varian ducks them inside- and Jun can see they're in a blacksmiths- the anvil still stands firm, as does the forge in the back. Varian glances around the place, his face softening- a bittersweet expression crossing it. He runs his free hand over the surface of the anvil. ]
...I missed this place.