1; action/text

[revenge_guac]

WHO: Shadow the Hedgehog and you
WHERE: A Labyrinth first, then the Libra Network
WHEN: slightly forward-dated to 1/20
WHAT: The world's worst first impression on multiple fronts (it's his intro)
WARNINGS: Full Sonic Movie 3 Spoilers, but nothing major beyond that

i. wish i may wish i might be someone else tonight (labyrinth)

[One more chance to do the right thing, he told Robotnik. Those last words of his blending into his last moments with Maria.

Shadow the Hedgehog moved the Eclipse Cannon away from the Earth’s atmosphere. Then there was nothing.

Or so he expected.

What he woke up to was worse than nothing. With a start he opened his eyes and found himself on grounds so familiar under his hands it made him sick. In shock he leapt to his feet to find his worst fears confirmed, that he was back in that nightmare repeated for 50 years. In his quick, horrified movements he kicked a standard-issue GUN blaster across the ground. Was that… was that in his hands?

It’s all but a habit that he called the first name that came to mind in the midst of him regaining his senses.]

Maria…?!

[She wasn’t anywhere to be found, only debris and a burning GUN base behind him. No presence, not even the Professor.

Was this hell? Was this where he was destined to go after it all…?

He tried running ahead for a sign of either life he cared about, be it Maria… or Professor Gerald…

Or Sonic the Hedgehog, even.

But it even felt like this gruesome nightmare cut his speed down considerably. Even if this was some endlessly looping hellscape, Shadow had to find someone. Something deep in his heart wished for this to be real just for a chance for Maria to have lived.

But if she didn’t… Did that pistol by him have something to do with it? No, it didn’t matter, someone he knew had to be here.

If someone he did not know came here, however… he would not hesitate to knock them into submission for information. In fact any who he senses or who approaches him will be glared down with a fist wound back, cracking with some sort of energy.]

ii. sometimes i wish i had never goT A PHONE–! (text: un; ultimatelifeform)

I have two questions.

1. Why was I brought to this city?

2. How can I leave?

Answer them quickly and don’t waste my time.

Comments

[revenge_guac]

[????????????????

What in the absolute hell is this??????]

Your answers don't help at all if they're completely indecipherable.

[doubledollar]

): what do u mean indecipherable
it was perfectly written!!! i gave u such concise answers
its not my fault that they were basically the same answer...

[revenge_guac]

I mean indecipherable. Half of the nonsense you spouted doesn't even contain words.

[doubledollar]

oh
ok i understand sry
i mean sorry, when i learned 2 to text on this thing my friends taught me short-form texting where u you replace some words with numbers or shorter letters to make it easier

i only have 1 hand so
texting is hard

[revenge_guac]

[...

Sigh.]

These devices are phones, aren't they? Use a function where you don't need to type.

[doubledollar]

[ well... ]

o yeah for sure theres a text to voice option but like im telling you i text SO MUCH every day i know everyone in the city just about
can u--sorry, you--imagine how much id be just talking into my phone every day just to send out messages?

even if texting with 1 hand isnt easy its better than using text to speech

anyway this isnt about me its about u

i still havent gotten your name!!

[revenge_guac]

If you speak aloud as much nonsense as you do in text I don't know how anything gets accomplished with you.

[Ugh, but he'll try to figure out what was said in the previous texts. Which was a whole lot of shrug noise. Which only worsened his mood.]

Both of your answers could have been "I don't know" and it would have accomplished the same thing. I told you not to waste my time.

But if it'll get you to stop: It's Shadow. Shadow the Hedgehog.

[doubledollar]

thats not very nice of you to say ): i didnt speak nonsense, i gave you some pretty good information there!! isnt it better to know that your situation and experiences are shared by others instead of thinking it might be hopeless or like
not to have an answer at all?

also introductions are totally normal when meeting new friends!! if youre stuck here like a bunch of us then we might as well get to know each other!!!

nice to meet you mr shadow the hedgehog! im vash the stampede :)

[revenge_guac]

Say it in less words next time. You can make a decent point in fewer words.

[Because unfortunately, it was a good point. "We don't know" was more of an answer than silence. But oh god, he's one of those buddy-buddy sorts. He can't deal with this right now he's still reeling about how he's even fucking alive bro don't do him like this.]

What gave you the impression I was interested in making friends, Vash the Stampede?

[doubledollar]

Okay. I can be so concise. so to-the-point. i can say so few words that it'll make your head spin! just wait and see.

[ ...he says, in a sentence that could have been way less words. ]

and that's easy. its because everyone needs friends. especially if youre new to this world and stuck somewhere strange. being all on your one-some is dangerous, there are some pretty bad things that come out of the spirit gate sometimes. like this blizzard. you dont want to be caught out there alone without anyone to look out for you.

[revenge_guac]

The evidence doesn't back up the claim.

[Please Stop Talking. Please Stop Reminding Him Of Sonic. Please Stop Reminding Him Of Maria.]

I can handle myself just fine. Anyone that tries to go against me will regret it.

[Granted, he is freezing right now. Which shouldn't happen as the Ultimate Lifeform but it's heckin col.]

[doubledollar]

we've been friends for like five minutes you just dont know yet!!!
sample sizes need to be bigger!!

and listen

its not always people who'll go against you
sometimes its stuff that you cant fight
sssssort'a like the blizzard outside right now

):

its cold out for hedgehogs...

text -> video -> text again

[revenge_guac]

You're proving it now. And who decided that we were friends? Isn't it supposed to be a mutual agreement?

[Shadow is getting a headache.]

I've handled worse than a Blizkjlfdkjg

[Oop, he dropped his phone cause of cold hand. And the video function on the app turned on. Shadow the Hedgehog is in fact at the very edge of the city's barrier near some place or another that just barely got under it. And he is covered in snow and frost from head to toe.

Vash could see that he was, in fact, talking to a hedgehog person.]

You're joking--. [He struggled a bit because 1. from the 70's 2. cold hand, but the video turned off.]

I've handled worse than a blizzard.

1/2

[doubledollar]

[ he's not texting right away because his eyes are LOCKED onto the screen.
acting like a buffoon as much as he does, he's got a mind that locks onto the smallest details and a photographic memory.

He saw that.
He saw you, Mr. The Hedgehog.
The playfulness instantly melts and it becomes almost desperate empathy, and he's getting up, and getting dressed. ]

2/2

[doubledollar]

Mr Shadow, even if u dont want to be friends, i cant just let you stay outside like that. youre going to freeze to death and no matter how strong you are noone can defeat hypothermia.

please let me know where you are, i can bring you somewhere warm until all of this blows over.
please.

[revenge_guac]

[Why can he not just be left alone?! It isn't like he was meant to be alive right now anyway.

But he's frustrated. Frustrated that he can't teleport or even really harness his energy right now. And he can feel how bitter and stinging this northern winter is. He should be able to brush this off, what is wrong with him? What is going on with him?

Thankfully for Vash. Shadow isn't stupid.]

I don't know where I am but it's close to a place that sells donuts.

[Landmarks helped but this one is kind of a weird one. Then again that's even more useful.]

[doubledollar]

[ he's not met a giant hedgehog-person yet but he's pretty sure they're not built for cold wet blizzards like this. so he's fully in vash-the-stampede, hero-of-all mode now as he grabs some extra blankets too--just to be sure. ]

is there a sign that says the name of the donut store? or is it the one that just has a giant donut outside of it?
i can be there soon either way, lucky for you that i know every donut spot in the city!!

sit tight and we'll have you warm soon.

[ and he bloody well WILL teleport to every fucking dunkin donut if he has to--or just to the giant donut hilariously near his house if it happens to be that one.
it's probably not unsettling to have a seven foot tall giant suddenly show up next to you or anything. ]

[revenge_guac]

There's a giant donut that's impossible to miss even in this weather.

[Kind jarring honestly. But yes it is conveniently the one not far from Vash's home that he's standing around.

And yes, actually, it's VERY alarming to have someone ELSE with teleportation suddenly appear next to Shadow. Once he did he pulled his fist back, cracking with Chaos energy and ready to swing in an instant.

But he took a minute to study this man. Shadow had to crane his neck to look at most humans, even Maria. But this is absolutely the tallest and gangliest one he's seen yet. Not that he's aware this isn't a human he's looking at.]

... Vash the Stampede?

[doubledollar]

[ maybe itll come up in a conversation at some point in the future--that he's definitely not a human and more an alien like shadow himself is--but that's not at all important right now. What's important is that he's found the little guy and he... oh he looks so cold. Like a frozen rat... ]

That's right! You just so happen to be really near my home too, doesn't that just luck out in the end!

[ his voice is... bubbly and playful, even though he's not nearly small enough to fit into the space shadow's found. But he is bringing out a few blankets, offering them to the other to wrap himself in. ]

This cold is awful, the worst winter I've seen in years, for real.
Are you able to walk? Or should I carry you? I promise I don't mind--you look frozen...

[revenge_guac]

[Flatly:]

How convenient.

[Shadow spoke against the cold so he was quieter than he normally would be. And in general he was pretty quiet, that much could be gauged from his general demeanor.

Equally flatly:]

Don't touch me. [Then he shook his head to clear what snow he could from his quills and fur. He looks slightly less like a frozen rat now but only slightly.

He gave Vash a Look. An "are you serious right now?" look. ... But took one of the blankets anyway.]

I can walk just fine.

[doubledollar]

Hey, we can't be too sure! I just don't want you to turn into a Hedge-sicle by the time we get back somewhere warmer, you know?

[ he points, through the blizzard, down the road a ways. ]

It's about a ten minute walk from here, so. If your legs are still good, we can make it in half the time if we really go for it! --My teleportation sadly only works for one person, so I just thought it might be faster if I carried you. ...You could. Um. Stand on my shoulders? If you don't want me to touch you?

The snow gets kinda deep in places...

[ he's gonna start leading the way, regardless. ]

[revenge_guac]

A "hedge-sicle", are you serious?

[Why has Shadow become a magnet for people who use the most out of pocket phrases? At least come up with something funnier.]

My legs work perfectly fine. You're the one who should wonder if you can make a shorter time against me.

[That being said, Shadow is still three foot three and sort of wading through the show as Vash led but he was still moving. At least the blanket helped.]

Why are you able to teleport too?

[doubledollar]

Yeah, I'm serious. If you stay out here too long you'll be frozen like a popsicle.

[ logically, it makes total sense, right?! ]

And are you suggesting a race?? You know, if it wasn't so cold and snowy out, I might take you up on that!! [ but given hes having to half-yell to even be heard, this is not the best idea.

the question though... maybe the hedgehog man came from a world where magic doesn't exist, like his? ]

You're in a world that's ... special. Staying here too long can give anyone special powers, if you're lucky enough.

I only just got the ability to teleport recently. I'm still getting used to it, heehe.

[revenge_guac]

[ROLLS HIS EYES.]

You wouldn't win even with clear ground. [Even Shadow had to raise his voice a little and his voice was shockingly deep and gritty for his stature, really.

But what Vash was saying combined with everything else... this was worrying if only because Shadow didn't like the idea of being tampered with anymore.]

I was able to teleport before I got here. And now I can't. Does that have something to do with people getting special powers in this world?

[doubledollar]

We'll just have to go see when this hell-winter is over and the ground is clear again!

[ he will have his ass beaten. vash can run like hell for days but he doesn't have super sonic speed... ]

--Oh, that! Yes. It was the same for me when I got here too. I felt sluggish and not at all myself. It took a few weeks to come back--but I got all my strengths back, too! With some new ones. Like teleportation! So if you're feeling off, well.

Just give it time!

[ they're closing the distance to the garden--it's really weird, to see how everything is huge snowpiles and drifts and white...

and in the distance there is a patch of... flawless green... ]