un: zodiac | Happy August!

[kaisoumods]

WHO: Everyone!
WHERE: Libra App
WHEN: August 1st
WHAT: Zodiac Network Post
WARNINGS: None!

[August is here, and that means the serene blue hues of the Spirit Vein have given way to red and orange, making it look like the sky itself is on fire. The air is drying out rapidly as well, as a heatwave is about to settle in. Everyone's devices will emit a soothing wind chime sound as a new Zodiac post appears. The chime will sound even if you have your phone turned off or on silent, and will not stop until you read their messsage and comment to it.]

Hello and thank you for using the Libra app.

Summer isn't over yet, which is good because some of you
need some sunshine and joy in your lives.

As for the current situation, Zodiac is here to help with accessing Asgard! The Zodiac employees we introduced last month are hard at work finding a solution to the broken Bifrost. Please wish them good luck. They'll need it!

We know that some of you are quite eager for a little chaos and mayhem, but you'll just have to sit tight a little longer. This is a great opportunity to work on your tan, do those chores you never seem to have time for, or maybe attend a group therapy session!

Did you know that the first Friday of August (August 2nd) is National Water Balloon Day? It's a great way to cool off!

And with that, we'll finish things off with the ever popular icebreaker!



This post is sponsored by Songerein Mattresses! A good night's sleep could be your dream come true!

[Users will have the option to choose their own display names and userpics if they haven't already. If nothing is chosen, the app will use their real name and a quick photo taken of them from their camera's phone.

OOC Note: If you haven't responded to AC, you still have until 11:59am EST today to do so! Once you do, you'll be removed from this post. ]

Comments

un: steadyflame; text

[reignitions]

Damn, who pissed in her cheerios this morning?

text; un: photocutie

[trailblazingspirit]

You can feel it too, right? They’re being nice on the surface but they’re actually being petty.

I mean, the group therapy session mention felt really pointed.

text: un: thedancer

[dancedwithplenty]

Pretty sure it was hotsauce, lbr

text | un: silhouetto

[threebetrayals]

What is this, AI generated?

un: tm149

[goodolrika]

Nah, an AI would probably be less insufferable than Janet.

un: luciferskylight

[scourgingstars]

Debatably worse, your standard soulless capitalism.

un: ragna

[centralfiction]

Telling them to eat shit would've been faster.

text | un: silhouetto

[threebetrayals]

How does that work for you, Tsuki?

text: un: MrColdFeet

[anyprice]

[ know who's gonna respond to the icebreaker? sampo
because he's terrified of the order and what's to come and needs a distraction from the existential crisis he's having over it

gotta have fun or the brain ghost gets weird ]

Omg bro do you know whats the most fun treat as well as good

have you ever rolled up pure maple syrup over freshly fallen snow

It's actually ah-mazing,!

text | un: chaosraccoon

[actnormal]

Okay but yes???? (((o(*°▽°*)o)))

un: yiling

[conseqweinces]

tell me you're canadian without saying you're canadian

un: violetsmoke

[infezione]

I've read about it, but I've never actually tried it...

Kind of want to now, though, that sounds like fun.

text; un: AUO

[throwmoreswords]

What in the poor are you extolling to people? Next you're going to say drinking saltwater just means you get extra minerals.

text; un: midnightfishing

[illucesco]

you are assuming i wake up early enough to catch the first snowfall.

Text | un: yunaka416

[unakite]

wowzers I haven't thought about that in years!
is it easy to get syrup here??
and does it snow in the winter???

text

[prunedworlds]

wait so you mean like you're basically making candy with syrup and snow??

voice | un: lastlullaby

[end_singer]

[Well, this month's post sure is... something.]

Never have I seen someone so frightened of sincerity that was not a habitual liar. Is the writer of this post alright?

[There isn't the slightest hint of sarcasm in his voice.]

Regardless, lately I find myself fond of small chunks of caramel covered in chocolate. Very satisfying on the teeth.

voice | un: yunaka416

[unakite]

Yu~mmy, that sounds decedent as all get out! [she replies in a sing-song-y voice, although not sarcastic-- just enthusiastic!]

Is it easy to find sweets like that around here?

text | un: laluna

[crisantemo]

im having enough chaos and mayhem trying to build ikea furniture with my dad and jinwoo. they're getting some interesting shapes out of chairs.....

and since we're talking about sweets, my current fave is hotteok. it's these pancakes with a sweet syrup filling they're really good

text; un: tempestdragon

[soulreleaser]

Do chairs truly come in shapes, Lady Lapis? I thought chair was the shape?? Do you have any examples?

I love pudding! Especially the little wiggly ones with the darkened top~ simply the most sublime of treats in my opinion, though your offering sounds remarkably tasty...

text; un: AUO

[throwmoreswords]

Marron Glacé. Especially fresh from a patisserie in France.

Aside from the silly icebreaking exercise and the new recordholder for the worst social media person working at Zodiac, I've a poll of my own for the crowd:

Is it rude to throw things at the Birthday Presents Skeleton or is it simply a hazard of the job, considering how twitchy magical freaks tend to be?

[infezione]

I feel like it's almost certainly just an occupational hazard... I know I'm used to them by now, but I can see how anyone who's seeing them for the first time would be startled.

un: violetsmoke; text

[infezione]

I like most sweets, honestly... But if I had to pick a favorite, it's definitely torta caprese.

Though specifically for this time of year, I like granita, especially strawberry or coffee-flavored.

Text | un: yunaka416

[unakite]

Lucky me, I'm learning all about sweets today
can I ask what's a torta caprese and a granita?
I'm guessing they're not the same thing?

un: captainkenway

[jackdawvision]

Bring back the other one, at least they’re honest about not wanting to deal with us.

Anyway, speaking of chores. There’s a ship still floating out there in the harbor and I mean to bring her in and make her mine own, but I dropped by and the seagulls tried to peck me half to death, so.

un: silverrose

[fionnuisce]

I don't quite see how anyone can help you fight off a flock of seagulls, but enlighten me.

text; un: theprofessional

[sg09r]

Wow. Okay. Sorry we're not full of sunshine and joy after our bosses tried to kill us and shot up our homes and dumped a prison into the harbor. Next time we're nearly killed we'll be sure to post a selfie.

Besides that: good news, I'm living at the Crystal Tower now, and I've gotten a temporary office in the meantime. So if anyone wants a PI on their case, give me a call, I'll give discounted rates.

text; un: DOINK!!!

[tonberrykin]

oooh what fun new piece of malware is this

it's like I backroomsed into a timeshare presentation that doesn't want me to realize I need to buy two weeks worth of a shitty cabin in the mountains in order to repay the kindness granted to me in the form of the world's worst lemonade and Krispy Kreme donut spread

be advised I have no money and medical debt so there's no blood in this stone, Beelzebub--put the devils aside for someone else

un: anon

[conseqweinces]

Hello, we've been trying to reach you about your car's extended warranty. Please provide your Name, Credit Card Information and last four digits of your Social Security Number.

text; un: badnews

[whitestonelives]

And she wonders why nobody likes to come to her parties.

Anyway, I can’t speak for the rest of us, but I can say that rather than good luck, I’d be far more appreciative of more ammunition than I currently have.

un: violetsmoke

[infezione]

Try Parasomnia Guns & Ammunition on Shopping Street?

... If you don't go there already.

text, un: greyhunt

[faenthras]

What on earth is all this? I lose track of my phone for less than a minute and someone has installed some weird app on it?

un: badnews

[whitestonelives]

[Grey Hunt…It can’t be.]

Welcome to Libra. If they try to tempt you with a premium membership, don’t take it, there are far better deals out there with far less targeted advertising.

Grey Hunt, hm?