Two Nights Only - Buy Now

[anyprice]

WHO: Sampo, Caelus, Noctis, and Gilgamesh
WHERE: Inside Gil's teapot, mostly.
WHEN: Just after the mid-month zodiac post
WHAT: Sampo having Noct and Caelus come stay over while things in the city aren't so hot. Chaos probably gonna ensue.
WARNINGS: Just general nonsense of four chaos goblins in one house.



[ 'Meet me outside of Poundland' isn't exactly the best sentence to say to ANYONE, and yet it's a sentence Samuel had to use today. Thinking back on it, he really wonders why the owners of this establishment decided on fucking THAT for the name of their store, but.

It did fine for a meeting place--especially given the 'place' he was staying was hidden in plain sight in the shop nextdoor. The shop that, in Undertown, many had wonderings if it was the front of some money laundering group. Which was hilarious.

Sampo can be found waiting--looking enough like "himself" to be recognizable, but with a mix of grey and blue hair instead of his usual ruffled brown.

He'll wiggle his fingers when Caelus and Noct finally approach, before throwing his arms out wide with a bright smile. ]

My friends! You. Uh.

You weren't followed, were you.

Comments

[illucesco]

[Noctis, therefore, retains the kingly right of simply letting out a snore and Not Moving.

He is napping here.]

[throwmoreswords]

[ he does not have the clearance to nap in another king's domain--do you want to cause a multiversal incident here??

Gil is gonna continue to lightly pump on Noct's belly with his foot for a bit. ]

Oi. Oi. Don't ignore me, mongrel.

If I have to put effort in, you will not like what happens next.

[illucesco]

[Hm, that’s a serious threat. Noctis considers this for a moment, before deciding he’ll risk the multiversal incident and continue his nap. This is signified with another, pointed snore, and a gentle little smack from a flipper to the foot.

No, you move.]

[throwmoreswords]

[ ah

so in the words of the ancient scholars and the sages

it is on like Donkey Kong ]

I see. It's time for what happens next, then. This is of your own doing, you tubby menace.

[ and Gil will take a moment to consider, turning every neuron of his tactically inclined mind to solving the problem of not wanting to Step Up High and Look Goofy

and will arrive at the conclusion that the floors are wood, and Noctis is not particularly sticky.

he's gonna grab him by the back flippers and start to drag Noctis down the hallway with ease. B rank strength, baby. ]

[illucesco]

[The terrible whine that escapes the seal as he’s hauled away is incredibly pitiful and tragic. As if he couldn’t, you know, move all that way either. He tries to wriggle away and use his front flippers to pull away, but alas. He is moved.

Noooooooooo his spot.]

[throwmoreswords]

[ while the narration is squealing internally at the thought of a heart-wrenching seal cry, Gilgamesh is a fucker and cares not for Noctis' misery and woe

he's gonna drag him down the hallway, into the entranceway, marching steadfastly for the door, holding tight to the beast despite his flapping and flailing ]

[illucesco]

[And then the Engine Blade appears in a shower of blue sparks!

And proceeds to fucking clatter onto the ground because it turns out Noctis, while he still has access to the Armiger, cannot hold shit all as a seal. This bodes ill for his grand plan of warping the hell away from his inexorable fate.

He just whimpers.]

[throwmoreswords]

[ he is so, so very tempted to pick that sword up and put it in his Gates

for the moment he just gives Noctis a narrow-eyed, incredulous look ]

Do you think you were doing something impressive with that maneuver? You're not even the only person who can pull that one off.

[ and still, he will drag Noctis along, out the door and towards the stairs that lead to the grassy island the house is floating on. ]

[illucesco]

[Do you want to deal with more seal whining? That’s how you deal with more seal whining.

Anyway, Noctis just gives the most tragic noise anyone has ever heard from a seal. Nooooo, his nap, it has been interrupted, he’s being exiled from the good nap spots, noooooooooooo.]

[throwmoreswords]

[ his heart is stone in the wake of the pinniped lamentations, even as his island rings with Noctis' big baby tantrums

it's time to drag him through the grass, past the structures, heading directly for the biggest of the ponds. ]

[illucesco]

[He just continues whining the rest of the way until he sees the ponds, and seems to calm down more. Huh. Okay. Ponds are good. He can have a nice little seal nap there. He squirms a little as if to say hey let me go I wanna go to the pond.

This is but a fraction of the struggle that Sampo had to deal with babysitting a younger, snottier version of this guy.]

1/2

[throwmoreswords]

[ and for a moment, the contentiousness rises in Gilgamesh ]

You have no idea how close I am to chucking you off the side of the island and letting whatever happens next happen.

2/2

[throwmoreswords]

[ but instead he will release the seal to impose up the pond, turning on his heel so that he can return to more civil spaces

with wine

and Mario Kart ]

[illucesco]

[And from right behind him, the seal calls:]

I’ll be back for the sword!

[Oh so he could talk all this time, and instead chose to be a whiny little shit.]

[anyprice]

.... [ peeking around the doorway is that recognisable blue-haired man, sipping on a juice box. ]

That was fun to watch.

[throwmoreswords]

You shut the hell up.

[ he's snatching that sword off the floor and putting it into a glimmering golden portal. ]

[anyprice]

Hey! What're you gettin' mad at me, for!

Hehe.

I didn't know you were that strong.

[throwmoreswords]

I'm not human anymore, Sam. I'm much stronger than you think I am.

[ ... case in point he's gonna move to grab Sampo and heft him over a shoulder, like a bag of beautiful, dorito shaped potatoes. ]

[anyprice]

[ he makes the most undignified, loud yelping noise. ]

He, hey! Hey, I almost dropped my juice--!

[throwmoreswords]

Skill issue.

[ time to cart Sampo around like he's hauling sacks of wheat for the mill. ]

[anyprice]

It isn't a skill! This isn't anything close to a skill!

[ he's being carried like he weighs nothing what the fuck

where are we going

who knows

he's gonna sip his juice. ]

[throwmoreswords]

[ of course Sampo weighs nothing have you seen his waist

you're going to the kitchen, Gil has been trying to hit up the wine this whole time damn it ]

It's a skill. Learn how to roll with the punches.

[anyprice]

[ he's so up, do you need him to reach the high shelves for you, he can reach, look. ]

I hate getting punched, I like to avoid getting punched if at all possible.

[throwmoreswords]

[ he might set him on the counter when he finally releases him from shoulder jail, so if he wants to go digging for stuff on the high shelves like the good crystal, it would be appreciated. ]

If you hate being punched, why is your face like that?

[throwmoreswords]

Just for that, it's my sword now.

[ he's gonna lock the door behind him noct can stay outside until further notice (or sam or caleb lets him in

maybe fluvius but homeboy doesn't have thumbs) ]