nicholas d. wolfwood (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
asipofbride) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
kaisou2023-08-03 07:49 pm
asipofbride) wrote in kaisou2023-08-03 07:49 pm
Entry tags:
[sermon 4] i got caught up in nowhere again
WHO: nicholas d. wolfwood, the cabin/auguries alliance, and you
WHERE: the network, the auguries of innocence, and the mean streets of kaisou
WHEN: 8/1 + 8/3
WHAT: at the beginning of the month, wolfwood runs into the strangest part of god's plan.
and then two days later his boss is kidnapped in broad daylight and it's all his fault (except for the part where it's the evil organization's fault but tomato tomato, you know?)
WARNINGS: cw for krusnik subplot (kidnapping), potential claustrophobia/children experimentation mention in the locked logs, otherwise wolfwood is just... kinda dumb and that's his cross to bear.
[a.] 8/1; a post to the network; text; un: ndwolfwood
so my apple exploded what the fuck?
[ attached is a picture of a happy little Appletun with a peanutbutter cup balanced on the top of his lil' apple cap ]
[b.i] 8/3, action; there's no way out of here [before]
life can't stop just because there are threatening things in the background; so things continue as they are with some... concessions. the buddy system is in full swing, and the children can't be left unattended, so that's how Wolfwood finds himself being delivered in his boss' car--hilariously a beater this time, to Vergil's prissy displeasure, but Eve and Kni seemed content enough in the backseat.
it's a routine delivery job; Vergil conveys Wolfwood to a location, and then Wolfwood is responsible for pulling the fairly big piece of merchandise out of his who-knows-what-the-fuck-it-is space to manhandle it into the client's home to their satisfaction, putting his superhuman strength to use and earning his paycheck. it's normal. they're being smart, there's two of them, the monsters hiding in the shadows should be brave enough to jump out, and yet.
Wolfwood is in the building, and the coin of God's indifferent bullshit lands on tails. ]
[b.ii] 8/3, action; in the labyrinth i disappear [after]
for a heartbeat, Wolfwood is frozen--he hears the screaming, sees the blue streak racing towards him with Kni and Eve under its inhuman arms, sees the edges of Vergil's frilly blue coat where there are people trying to pin him and hold him under some shadowy piece of bullshit, and he goes in two different directions--
he should pull the Cross Punisher and open fire, but Vergil's right there in the line of fire and the kids (or is it just Kni?) are screaming, and Vergil is yelling for them to go and Wolfwood's never been one to be too attached to standing his ground. the Doppleganger shoves the children into Wolfwood's arms and then it flashes back towards its master, and Wolfwood breathes out and steps back even as Eve begs to wait, to help, but Wolfwood is stepping back into his spatial closet and slamming it shut. the Cross Punisher is at his back and he shuffles the kids together on his left, arm around them as he rips the cover loose and engaging the Punisher, the green lights bathing the inside of the space in a green glow as Wolfwood braces it on his leg, pointing at the place where the closet opened from.
he breathes out, slow, fishing for his phone in his pocket, squeezing the kids tight as he taps his phone on and thumbs through his contacts with shaking fingers.
he squeezes his fingers tight, holding down on Dante's ring with a steady, unrelenting pressure; he swallows the guilt at abandoning Vergil to whatever's happening outside and locks it away in the deep, quiet place where he stores his emotions when he's got work to do as he adds Vash and Dante to a call and waits for it to connect. ]
It's gonna be all right. [ he murmurs, as the ringing tone sounds, impersonal beeping ] You guys are gonna be all right. I promise.
WHERE: the network, the auguries of innocence, and the mean streets of kaisou
WHEN: 8/1 + 8/3
WHAT: at the beginning of the month, wolfwood runs into the strangest part of god's plan.
and then two days later his boss is kidnapped in broad daylight and it's all his fault (except for the part where it's the evil organization's fault but tomato tomato, you know?)
WARNINGS: cw for krusnik subplot (kidnapping), potential claustrophobia/children experimentation mention in the locked logs, otherwise wolfwood is just... kinda dumb and that's his cross to bear.
[a.] 8/1; a post to the network; text; un: ndwolfwood
so my apple exploded what the fuck?
[ attached is a picture of a happy little Appletun with a peanutbutter cup balanced on the top of his lil' apple cap ]
[b.i] 8/3, action; there's no way out of here [before]
locked to vergil, kni, eve; cw: kidnapping
[ it's supposed to be a routine job.life can't stop just because there are threatening things in the background; so things continue as they are with some... concessions. the buddy system is in full swing, and the children can't be left unattended, so that's how Wolfwood finds himself being delivered in his boss' car--hilariously a beater this time, to Vergil's prissy displeasure, but Eve and Kni seemed content enough in the backseat.
it's a routine delivery job; Vergil conveys Wolfwood to a location, and then Wolfwood is responsible for pulling the fairly big piece of merchandise out of his who-knows-what-the-fuck-it-is space to manhandle it into the client's home to their satisfaction, putting his superhuman strength to use and earning his paycheck. it's normal. they're being smart, there's two of them, the monsters hiding in the shadows should be brave enough to jump out, and yet.
Wolfwood is in the building, and the coin of God's indifferent bullshit lands on tails. ]
[b.ii] 8/3, action; in the labyrinth i disappear [after]
locked to kni, eve, dante, nero, vash, libra; cw: kidnapping, claustrophobia, potential mentions of experimentation on children
[ "Hide the children!"for a heartbeat, Wolfwood is frozen--he hears the screaming, sees the blue streak racing towards him with Kni and Eve under its inhuman arms, sees the edges of Vergil's frilly blue coat where there are people trying to pin him and hold him under some shadowy piece of bullshit, and he goes in two different directions--
he should pull the Cross Punisher and open fire, but Vergil's right there in the line of fire and the kids (or is it just Kni?) are screaming, and Vergil is yelling for them to go and Wolfwood's never been one to be too attached to standing his ground. the Doppleganger shoves the children into Wolfwood's arms and then it flashes back towards its master, and Wolfwood breathes out and steps back even as Eve begs to wait, to help, but Wolfwood is stepping back into his spatial closet and slamming it shut. the Cross Punisher is at his back and he shuffles the kids together on his left, arm around them as he rips the cover loose and engaging the Punisher, the green lights bathing the inside of the space in a green glow as Wolfwood braces it on his leg, pointing at the place where the closet opened from.
he breathes out, slow, fishing for his phone in his pocket, squeezing the kids tight as he taps his phone on and thumbs through his contacts with shaking fingers.
he squeezes his fingers tight, holding down on Dante's ring with a steady, unrelenting pressure; he swallows the guilt at abandoning Vergil to whatever's happening outside and locks it away in the deep, quiet place where he stores his emotions when he's got work to do as he adds Vash and Dante to a call and waits for it to connect. ]
It's gonna be all right. [ he murmurs, as the ringing tone sounds, impersonal beeping ] You guys are gonna be all right. I promise.
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he's still my same little guy, right
he sounds different now when we talk
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he went from apple sized to pie sized
do i need to be worried that he's gonna be table sized or some shit in a month
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did we raise him good or were we supposed to not feed him so many peanutbutter cups
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[PEANUT BUTTER CUPS?!]
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cups. ]
alright, alright, if you say so
if we aren't supposed to eat pokemon why does he look like a pie
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vash is baking as we speak
the smell of cooked apples is wafting through the air and there's a little pie waddling around in front of me
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@ Rosewood sensei
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you haven't explained how the little namedogs are any different from like
a chicken or a tomas
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Hello! I'm Dr. Rosewood! It's a pleasure to meet you.
I've read up a little on your conversation so that I can assist Azalea, here. There's a reason they look like an apple pie and it's to attract insects to them. The Appletun will then eat those insects they lure in rather than having to hunt for them. While it's safe to have specifically the nectar and the "apple pie" part of their backs as a snack, if you go too far you will cause significant harm to the Appletun. You can also use that nectar in a variety of baked goods!
Oh, yes, also be careful if you startle the little fella! Those insects will fight to the death to protect the Appletun, and they're also capable of unleashing a torrent of sticky nectar from their mouth.
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[ ... that is a lot of info, though. some of it is terribly fascinating, especially for someone who overthinks. ]
there's nectar? can you. milk the appledog for the nectar?
how much of the apple pie is too much? does it hurt them at all to remove parts of it? are these insects like, little assholes or are they also some sort of creature that says their own name?
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Sort of, yes! You can't milk it like a cow. It's more or less like harvesting honey from a beehive.
You should see a gradient on the body that goes from apple pie to its actual skin. A good rule of thumb to be safe is to make sure you don't go any further than two inches above the green skin. It won't hurt the Appletun, but it'll let you know if it does. If it gets very sensitive to touch, you'll want to bring it to one of us at POKEGO for a check up.
The insects are normal insects! Bug-type Pokemon can also be attracted to the scent, but that should only be a concern from the Kanto realm for the time being.