kaisou | Recentering Priorities

Recentering Priorities

WHO: Luz & You
WHERE: Owlery and outside in Kaisou
WHEN: August 22
WHAT: Luz is doing various things!
WARNINGS: none

[Closed to Eda/Amity]

I. The Owlery

Between the dinosaur attacks, the fights she had with people ABOUT said dinosaurs, her injury and then people's reactions to all of that, Luz's feelings were already taking a turn. She felt the guilt of knowing people were hurt or killed because of the experimentation Varian had done taking a turn. She was frustrated that people thought Varian meant harm and was told in full ferocity how bad things had gotten. Luz had done her best to help, lost contact with people, was then injured and told after said injury that she needed to not get herself involved in dangerous situations.

And then? Amity Blight, her girlfriend, arrives, and all of that takes a backseat.

Because Amity has some stories of her own, and now? Luz knew exactly how bad things got back home. The spell Phillip casts almost kills everyone, narrowly stopped by the actual Collector, but now all of them were locked out of the Boiling Isles, stick on Earth.

Devastating to her? Certainly. But Amity, a witch who had lived her entire life on the isles? That had to be a blow she was doing her best to recover from. Right now Luz is watching her hermosa sleep, deep in thought. She barely looks up when Eda enters the room.

II. Undertown [Open to those affiliated with the paranormal]

The setback with the dinosaur and then with Fern had cemented something into her head: she had to get better. She had her full abilities now, but even still there was a chance that things that could hurt her. So Luz was now in deep reading, looking at ways to perfect her glyphs, ideas for protections with the glyphs she could use. She still couldn't used combined glyphs, she knew that well enough. But what about what she could do with the powers she had?

She was scanning books she could get her hands on right now, carefully leafing through what she could to get ideas on how she was going to give herself added protection. You could see around Luz there were scribbling of plan foliage protecting her, or pictures of her with fire surrounding her.

The time for Luz being idle was over. She had to start making plans for what happened the next time things got really bad.

III. Shopping Street

Luz may have been determined to get better at her magic and whatever spiritual craziness might happen, but she also knew something else: August was almost over. She was, against her better judgement, going to have to BE a kid: she was going to have to go to school again, and that meant preparing for all of the things that came with it. If you were a student (or teacher), she was going to say hi and probably pump you full of questions about what she can expect!

IV. Cemetery (Closed to Amity)

She hadn't told anyone about this, and she honestly wouldn't know how to anyway. Then here comes her girlfriend in tow, changing just about everything, and then comes the day she didn't expect would be creeping up on her, but here it is. So Luz leaves Amity a message, just a single one.

Be at the cemetery. Please? Need you.

And Luz is here already, with as big a bouquet of flowers she could make.

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Oddly enough, Moana actually kind of liked back to school shopping. She liked going back to school as much as any other high school student, but there was something about having clean, new supplies that was fun to have, especially find supplies in styles to match her colorful personality.

It was only too bad that they would all get ruined in about a day or so back into school, but it was nice while it lasted.

As she is looking through some different things for sale, she catches sight of a familiar figure and waves. "Hey, Luz!" Moana hadn't actually seen the other girl since all of the dinosaur craziness, even though she'd been doing what she could to help and she had a feeling that Luz had too, so she is relieved to see her.

Honestly? Luz liked the shopping part! Like Moana, she liked choosing all of the materials that reflected her, the smell of new notebooks and pens and pencils, even planners that she might or might not use. It was fun!

And then school would happen, which Luz would have to hope was better than it had been in the past.

After the absolutely not fun time of the dinosaurs though? Luz is actually pretty happy to see Moana, and gave the girl a heart wave back.

"Hi! Good to see you again, Moana! Getting stuff to start your new semester too?"

She doesn’t need to be told. Even with the time differential, there’s no reason for Luz to want to meet her in a graveyard other than…well.

She comes up to Luz quietly, putting a hand on her shoulder.

“The flowers are really nice.”

She hadn't known time would go so fast, but when it did and she had no choice but to observe its passage, this is where it came to. There was no way for her to forget this day, and when Amity is here, her heart swells.

Of course she'd come. She knew. Her girlfriend was that girl who understood. She might have had Odalia's stubbornness in her, but there was compassion and gentleness Odalia would never possess. Luz had always understood the day she fell for Amity Blight. It was the day she decided her life and her decisions were more important than her mothers'.

And somehow, that involved her too.

"Thanks," she said, smiling, "but these aren't just for dad."

She looked around her, placing the bouquet on the floor.

"It's for the dinosaur victims too."

She let there be a moment of silence for that, knowing without being told that Luz undoubtedly could have been among that number. It's her nature. So she says nothing, just lets her hand drift into Luz's, fingers entwining with hers.

"Of course it is," she said, finally. Because Luz cared. About everyone. Luz, who never let an injustice pass her by, never turned her head. It was really, really easy to fall for someone like that, it turned out.

Considering that dinosaur that blinded her? Yes, that absolutely could have been her. It a combination of Owlbert and Mal the Jedi that she was able to get away in one piece. She does take Amity's hands though, and heaves a sigh.

"When I first got here, I have to admit, I was freaking out. I went through a labyrinth which looked like that place inbetween when I tried to make a portal. This was just after I just found out what Philip was trying to do, and what Hunter actually was. Then I show up HERE. Eda is not my Eda, Hunter still hasn't gone to that memory yet. So I was pretty desperate to get back."

She swallowed. "Have you met a boy named Varian?"

"That's a lot to freak out about," she replied, giving her hand a squeeze. "Now I'm glad I got dragged here. You needed somebody who could help."

But she nodded about the latter.

"I've met him, yeah."

"Maybe too much. There are lots of people here who have their own stuff to deal with, but that was how things were going on my end. I'm not the only one who has someone from their world that's somehow born HERE."

Luz sighed.

"He's made portals before. He's a guy of science, though he's behind some of the stuff in my world. Still, he was the guy we trusted and hoped would be able to make the portal to take us back home. But something went wrong, and somehow, he let dinosaurs into this world."

She could still hear Bakogou's voice and his accusations.

"They've killed and hurt people and wrecked a lot of things. I supported Varian and I've tried to help him so...that makes me responsible for some of that destruction. Maybe not directly, but Varian had help from several of us, so that's no excuse."

She had drawn very different conclusions, from what she'd heard, and her own perspective.

"I don't think it's either of your faults. Especially not you." She turned Luz a bit to look at her. "You supported a plan to get everybody home. It went wrong, but that's not your fault. Honestly, I'd put any blame at Hunter's feet for it."

She shook her head. "He knows how powerful such a substance is, and encouraged its use? For what reason? This isn't the good Hunter - this is the one that still wants to get back to Belos...wouldn't put it at all past him to risk all our lives to do that."

Ah, so she'd been listening to people. That's honestly a very good idea. Luz can sometimes only get part of the story.

"Amity, I wanted to get back to the Isles! Badly, I mean, so badly, and now people are hurt! I never wanted-if I knew this would happen, I'd never have told Varian to continue doing what he was doing!"

She sighed. "Hunter was never bad, Amity, that's the thing. It's more like something King said to me that day: you don't want to believe you've been lied to your whole life, and that's why I've never told Hunter what happened that day. It's not right. More importantly, there's no way he'd believe me even if I did."

What's she's heard points to an experiment that failed spectacularly, which is...common enough in the Boiling Isles. She doesn't blame Varian for that. She blames a substance being put in his hands that wasn't fully understood or completely under control.

"You can be fooled, and deceived, and still do bad things, Luz. I don't think he's like...my mom, or Belos, but...he's still dangerous as long as he's brainwashed. And he can still do bad things. But that's...that's a bigger discussion we don't need right now."

She gently stepped in front of Luz, putting her hands on her cheeks.

"You have nothing to feel guilty about. I know you feel like you do, because you're you, and you always take responsibility. And you're so willing to be in the wrong, because you have a good heart and..."

Oh, to hell with it. She plants the first proper kiss on Luz since she arrived. The first one that isn't tinged with imminent danger, or an enemy to fight.

"Heh, crikey," she says, afterwards, ferociously red in the cheeks. "I know how badly you wanted to get back. Because you're you, and it's why I'm just a little over the moon about you. Let's remember people for now, and then? We'll start looking for another way to get back. Together, this time."

That was the thing though: Varian absolutely DID blame himself for that, and Luz could tell that the boy had some kind of complicated history involving hurting people that this failure had hit him deep. Luz knew, even if she hadn't been as physically responsible as Varian might be, she still wanted to leave as badly as he did, and in that want people had gotten hurt. Not meaning for it to happen didn't mean they were off the hook.

"He's changing though, Amity. That's the great thing! There are people here who are helping him to see he can value himself, that he doesn't have to throw his life away for a cause. He just needs the chance to get there!"

She did have her face grabbed by Amity, and Luz's face was red, because WOW Amity was getting more bold, and having not had her around for so long just compounded how much happier she was.

"I should still be thinking about the people here, Amity. They're great, and I want to do well by them. I don't want them hurt either! And then there's you and the others still trapped in my-"

And then she kisses her. Just. Kisses HER. And the moment that happens, it's like Luz goes full tilt EXE. not working.

"W--wowurgoobza," Luz mumbles, staring at her girlfriend with adoring eyes. "Yeah. Yes, right! We'll do that!"

She paused. "Hey, um. Have we...kissed before?"

A small fact she'd forgotten in all that. This was, for Luz, the first kiss. Oh.

"Oh, geez," she said, hands curling over her mouth. "Did I do a good job? Oh, I totally forgot, I was just remembering when you kissed me, and it was the most romantic thing in the world and..."

Red, red, red, red, red.

"You know what, I should just...go. Somewhere. Stick my head in a bucket. Normal things."

Because she could be, and was, confident. But Luz did things to her, too, all the time. But she stops herself, taking a few deep breaths.

"Buuuut I'm not going to, because I know how you're feeling and I have a Girlfriend Plan to help. Came up with it when I got your message."

She'd promised she'd be the best girlfriend ever, and means it.

They've had cheek kisses, and Luz doesn't hesitate to swing her girlfriend around like the goddess she is, but a full on real kiss? That was just. Everything.

And there's Amity babbling that she didn't think it was perfect. She was here. She was HERE. Luz didn't even have a choice but to pull her in and give Amity a return kiss, with her hands on the girl's hips.

"That was perfect, hermosa. Absolutely perfect. You being here makes anything bad that happened feel like nothing I can't handle."

For that moment, she could totally forget that they were stranded on Earth, that they were here. For right now, Luz was on cloud nine.

"Ooh, a girlfriend plan? You mean you do more than just be here being perfect and making things amazing? Clue me in!"

"Yeah, it's good to see you too. I'm glad to see you're okay after all that craziness."

At least, as far as she could see.

"Uh-huh. It's about that time of year again. I'm looking for some cute stuff to personalize."

"Not without lack of trying, that's for sure. I was blinded by one of those dinosaurs at one point. It was pretty scary."

And not something she wanted to relive again.

"You know, while I wasn't gung-ho on going to school, I am excited about this part! Also, some things have changed too, so I don't feel anywhere near as bad as I have been!"

Luz's cheeks are still red, and she's got a bit of a silly smile on her face. Clearly someone has gotten some good news.

Her memory differs from reality in several key ways. Mainly because as she remembers it, Luz swept up onto her balcony with vines and flowers, with the sun behind her and then, well, the kiss was just inevitable. Her own role in initiating it is lost in The Moment.

Reading can enhance memories, really.

But Luz kissing her again pulls everything into very soft focus and there's a second before she can respond, her brain doing the equivalent of an old computer's boot up noise.

"Huh? Oh, yeah, I've got an idea. It's a secret. Not much of a secret, but a secret."

Luz would actually be pretty surprised to learn that it was Amity who kissed HER, but she was still pretty blown away either way you looked at it. She gets to share a kiss with her girlfriend, a REAL kiss, and wasn't recovered from that yet.

Really, had she been in a bad place before? She couldn't even remember it now.

And there was Amity still looking as adorably cute about the kiss as she felt, and then listened in.

"Ooh, secrets! Actually, I have a secret of my own! Do you know I can actually tap into your memories?"

Well that one came out of left Grudgby field. She blinked a few times.

"Huh, that's...when did that happen?"

She wasn't entirely sure she liked the idea of her memories being tapped into, even if it was Luz. Being inside Willow's head once was enough for her in terms of that sort of thing.

It just happened to be something that happened to Luz that she'd kept to herself. No one except Luisa Madrigal knew about this, and Luz wanted to keep it that way, at least so she wouldn't be intrusive to other people.

"A few months ago. I actually got three new powers. That's just the most interesting one! I also have a super heightened sense of smell now, which can be fun and also awful depending on the situation, and a thermometer that reads the emotions in any given room."

Which brought Luz to why she mentioned it.

"I was actually hoping you'd let me see what happened in the Boiling Isles the last few days. I can't help but feel out of the loop. I know you gave me a general idea, but it'll really help me get an idea on what happened there. Before you got here, I've been pretty adamant about getting back and stopping the day of Unity. I'd at least like to know how it all went down, even if we both don't know what happened the moment we left."

The sudden stab of anxiety was unexpected, but really shouldn't have been. Since she'd gotten here, she could rely on exhaustion at first, and then focusing on the future: trying to get back, proper time with Luz.

Which kept her from thinking. From reliving watching the collapse of her world. From wondering if everyone they knew was dead. Or if her family was suffering unspeakable, unimaginable torments at the hand of the Collector. And suddenly it was all back again, towering spires of ideas for good dates and being an actual girlfriend crumbling into dust because she was right back where she had started.

But she couldn't say no, could she? Luz just needed to know, because of course she did. Which of course just meant that there'd be two of them in a bad place, but then Luz already was, right? Right. But she also doesn't want Luz to know that, well, they can't stop the Day of Unity. Not really. The best they could manage, or that King could manage, in the end, was something that might arguably be worse.

Frankly the best news of the entire day was that Belos was dead, and that by itself is seared into her memory, that fight against the ghoulish, rotted thing he really was underneath. And then the Collector splattering their worst enemy like an overripe fruit.

But she can't keep things from Luz, that'd make her a bad girlfriend and a bad person, wouldn't it? Much as she wants to, right now. But hey, it doesn't matter, because now that it's brought up again, she's reliving it all over again anyway, hurray!

So what else is she to do but put on the best poker face she learned from her mother and reply: "Well, ok. I guess that's what we're doing now. Somewhere less public I hope."

Said with a gentle punch of the air, as if everything is ok, and desperately trying to radiate that it is.

Edited 2022-08-26 17:17 (UTC)

Luz would have liked nothing better than to plan out how things would be going with her girlfriend: she was the reason she felt like she could do anything right now, even with the lingering thought that the dinosaurs that came through still were at least, in some part, her fault.

And the other thing: Luz had remembered what Amity had said that day, about how things turned out, but she was just hearing about it, like some outsider. This was partly why she'd never told Hunter what had happened the day they entered Phillip's mind: how did you go and tell someone who was your enemy that his beliefs and his credo were all built on a man who had no qualms about hurting everyone to appease some misplaced sense of justice in his warped brain?

Luz had spent her time in Kaisou wondering how things had turned out, desperately hoping there was a way home, angry at herself anytime she allowed herself small enjoyment of being here with these new people. There was no way for her to feel relaxed knowing what might be happening on the Isles, and here was Amity, with at least an answer that could ease some of that anxiety and fear that she was abandoning the people she cared about.

Luz took Amity's hands, and did her best to look brave, not desperate, like she was feeling right now. She had to take this information in properly, with as much care for her girlfriend as Luz could give. She tried to show Amity she wasn't just some person giving her information about people she was desperate for: it was Amity Blight, her most precious person.

"I know it's not ideal," she said softly, "but I'd also it rather not be where Eda could hear us. It would just be confusing to her, and I...don't think I could take that."

A good move, since those hands were shaking, just a little bit.

Everything about Eda makes sense and she just nods to that. She's barely even seen this version of Eda, but the way Luz talks about things...

"Just...it's bad, Luz. It's really bad." To her credit, her voice doesn't quaver, but the mistiness in her eyes says a lot.

"You did everything that...you did absolutely everything you could. Just...know that, before we start."

Luz felt the shaking of her girlfriend's hand and swallowed, understanding quickly. She touched her forehead gently to Amity's.

"Amity," Luz said softly, "If you'd rather not...we won't. I won't make you feel bad here, where you might be reliving something that hurt you."

Luz wanted to know, NEEDED to know, but not at the expense of causing Amity pain. She just got here, and she was going to make her relive something awful?

Like what happened to Luz when she first arrived here in the labyrinth?

At that reveal though, Luz blinked. "I would do whatever I could. The Boiling Isles is like...a home! I was different before I arrived there, before I met all of you. I'd do whatever I needed to make sure we didn't let Bellos do what he was planning!"

She squeezed Luz's hands in turn, shutting her eyes.

"No, you need to know," she says, swallowing her own feelings as best she can. "And we all tried, Luz. We all..."

She runs out of words, squeezing her eyes tight to keep the tears in.

"I can only show you."

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Recentering Priorities

III

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CW: Anxiety, traumatic thoughts

Re: CW: Anxiety, traumatic thoughts [RIGHT BACK AT YA]

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