kaisou | video | un: kissmyash

WHO: Ash + the app
WHERE: The app mostly
WHEN: June 16th
WHAT: Ash needs to explain something to the app
WARNINGS: Ash swears? Discussion of Krusnik and the child experimentation therein?

[When the video starts, Ash...is not in his RV and he does not look good at all. He frankly looks like he's been through literal hell and when he speaks he doesn't sound all that much better.]

I know I ain't got that many people on this stupid app who give a fuck, but people might've felt somethin' in the spirit realm a few days ago and this is just easier.

[A beat because really how do you explain this? Especially to people who probably don't care?]

If you were here in, what, March? You probably heard about Krusnik. If you weren't, they're a bunch of fucking assholes who take kids or people who won't be missed and do all sorts of fuckin' shit to them. The lab I was at was tryin' to get someone possessed by a god. I didn't get a god, but I got as close as they probably ever got before I got out. If you were ever wonderin' why I was always picking fights, having an asshole in your head that said "fight every week or you're gonna suffer" from the age of nine will do that to you.

[God he hates this. The recording actually cuts out here and doesn't cut back in for some time as he tries to make himself do this. He needs to do this. If he doesn't, he won't use the app ever again and he knows that about himself.]

Anyway, fucker's gone. I didn't pay the price an' he took offense. Opened a tear into his realm and nearly got me good, but...other people noticed and got me out. Ain't possessed anymore so hey, good news, it's possible to break that shit so long as you got a really good healer and people who can destroy spirits or whatever the fuck happened. [He knows but he's not outting Zero's abilities like that.] So. Yeah. If you felt something in the spirit realm a few days ago, that was me. Or, the asshole, I guess.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Fair. [About the Greek one] And I have no idea really. It was quite a Choice.

After the Disney Renaissance, Disney floundered again for a number of years. There's a lot of movies, but I think you could skip most of them besides Emperor's New Groove because that is used for a lot of memes, and Lilo and Stitch I think you'll find relatable.

[A destructive lab creature trying to find their place in the world? Look it made Jun feel things okay]

And while disney was floundering, another animation company named Pixar started gaining traction. They have a lot of great movies, but I think the biggest ones to see is the Toy Story trilogy. If you watch any other Pixar movies, I recommend only doing it with people you don't mind seeing you cry.

...Oh, and it's a Dreamworks movie, but I'm required to recommend Prince of Egypt. It covers Moses's story in the Book of Exodus and if you don't like it I'm going to reassess our friendship.

Pixar movies are boyfriend only movies, got it.

[Since if it might make him cry, it's almost certainly going to make Elliot cry and frankly Ash is not strong enough to see one of his sorta-parents cry.]

And make sure to watch the Moses movie.

[Lets face it you probably just mention a Pixar movie to Elliot and he starts tearing up]

You have a boyfriend?

[This is new information to him!!]

Yes. You can believe in whatever religion you want or not believe in anything at all- I don't care about that. But that movie is mandatory viewing.

Gotcha.

[Oh, yeah, he hasn't told anyone outside of the Dads.]

Yeah, uh. Pat? We started dating in May. We're not shouting it from the rooftops but...yeah.

Oh, Fugo! I remember him from the mission.

Congratulations you two! I'm happy you have someone like that.

Yeah. Pretty sure I don't deserve him, though.

Of course you do, don't be stupid.

[Pretty much sums up what Ryouta regularly tells jun when he gets in such a state]

Anyway, we're now in the modern era of Disney. They currently only make movies in 3D animation, and there's plenty of good ones. The most famous one is Frozen which was extremely popular when it came out, to the point it gained it's fair number of vocal haters who are annoyed at how popular it is. Personally...I think the movie is fine. It's not Disney's best, but it's better than some people give it credit for.

[!]

Oh. And you should see the Bee Movie. It's about a human woman falling in love with a bee.

[Wow Jun, tell him how you really feel.

. . .]

Why're you suggesting a movie about a bee?

Because not all important cultural experiences are good ones, Ash.

Are you saying I need to watching a fucking meme, Jun?

Yes, that's right.

[Laughing his ass off]

Fuck you.

[He laughs]

Watching an incredibly bad movie is an important experience! And the rest of my list are good movies.

Jun? I've seen the Cats movie.

[A pause]

Willingly? And you still found someone that'd date you?

[HE'S JOKING]

We had a sub in English one day and for some fuckin' reason they put that on! I wish they didn't! I really, really wish they didn't! My sleep paralysis demons are gonna be those fucking cats!

That...is quite a choice for a movie to put on for high schoolers.

You should still watch the Bee movie and see it is overwrites those memories.

I think they wanted to curse us like they were cursed. Maybe Bees will be better.

Mm. It's bad, but in a funny way at least.

After you get through this list, we can start on Studio Ghibli movies.

Oh, I've seen those. Elliot and Rean invite me an' Jusis over for dinner all the damn time, and Rean's a fucking nerd.

Oh right, you know Rean! We're both members of the anime club at the university.

Somehow that doesn't surprise me. But yeah, we're good on Ghibli. After Disney, maybe I'll hit you up for anime. I ain't asking Rean, he probably has fifty recs and no chill.

[And Jun has chill?!]

Haha, alright! I'll think over which animes to recommend....and try to keep it under fifty.

[Yeah like he has chill]

Oh- and one last thing about disney! You need to know about the Mickey Mouse gang.

These guys are from a bunch of different cartoons and are seen as Disney's "main characters".

The one in red is Mickey Mouse. He's considered Disney's mascot character and if you hear someone say "The Mouse" - they probably mean him or Disney.

The mouse with a bow is Minnie Mouse. She's Mickey's long time girlfriend or wife? It's not really clear, but they seem happy together.

The duck in a sailor suit is Donald Duck. He's a very temperamental guy, always angry, and is pretty much incoherent to most people. He has three nephews named Huey, Dewey and Louie who look identical besides the colors they wear. You're not expected to be able to tell them apart.

The duck with a bow is Daisy Duck. She's Donald's girlfriend and could do so much better.

Goofy is the dog with the hat. He's a very clumsy guy that goes "hyuck" a lot. He doesn't have a canon partner, but he is the only one of the gang with a biological child named Max. This means Goofy has canonly had sex and that's a fact you're going to have to live with.

Pluto is the other dog. He's...just a normal dog and can't talk.

Edited 2023-06-18 15:53 (UTC)